The Erotic Witch Project (2000)

hyped garbage

Absolutely the worst movie.

Pretty good movie overall. First half was nothing special but it got better as it went along.

The performances transcend the film's tropes, grounding it in characters that feel more complete than this subgenre often produces.

I was very drunk when I first watched this and at the time I thought that it was very erotic and funny. Thinking about it though it was a bad film with no acting, story or anything except naked women in softcore action. It was a short film as most of the footage was just repeats of previous shots but mirrored to confuse the horny teenager into thinking that it is a real film. Worth watching to get horny but that's all as watching this alone normally would not be erotic or in the slightest entertaining. It was like the Teletubbies with someone shouting "again, again" before being subjected to the exact same sequence again.

Spoilers herein.I'm one of the few (it seems) that really got excited about 'Blair Witch,' (and its sequel) as a cinematic event. I thought it was intelligent and clever. A lot of innovation in film concerns the relationship between observers and characters, and this was a novel take - especially the split between the video and film perspectives.Additionally, it opened a new approach to both making and viewing. Watchers could get it without worrying about Godard. Filmmakers could play with a low cost production path. So something like this was inevitable. And it does start out as if it understood the strategy.Surely a successful film could be made along these lines. But it would have to follow the rules of the camera: in every case you know who the filmer is. This project inexplicably tossed the convention midway. Perhaps they thought the gorilla was an operator/viewer.The erotic stuff really could have worked, if it were erotic in any way. What we needed was 'ordinary' women without all the trappings of porn stars: hair, tattoos, runway trims, by- the-book sex. I think the right characters would be high schoolers along the lines of Larry Clark.But what really kills this is the notion of magic. In the original, the world of observation enters a world of influence. All the influence is external, not internal as they would have here.Too bad. I think someone can made a good and popularly effective film something like this, but this ain't it.Ted's Evaluation -- 2 of 3: Has some interesting elements.

Less spoof and more sex than I expected, although it's all soft-porn. The story of 3 girls getting horny because of the presence of the erotic witch is pretty lame of course, but oh well, who cares. Best scene: the gorilla having sex with the sex-doll... now there's something I hadn't seen yet...

In the midst of the popularity of The Blair Witch Project, it was inevitable that such a pop phenomenon would come to inspire so many parodies. Unsurprisingly, one such spoof took the soft core path, and it's probably the most popular of the bunch.Take the original plot, make it three young women instead of two guys and a girl, and put them off to the woods in the search of the legendary erotic witch and you've got the (very) basic plot for The Erotic Witch Project. Of course, these three ladies come under the influence of the erotic witch and end up getting into all sorts of lesbian encounters with one another.Since this is a softcore film, this should be reviewed on an entirely different basis than the average movie. After all, things such as acting, writing, and competent direction don't matter here. All you need to see are three attractive women who display lots of skin and get it on with one another. Even at that, it's hardly perfect, but it'll probably work up a quick fix for those who like this sort of thing (being a guy, I do like this sort of thing).The three women on hand are Katie Keane (who now seems to go by the name Laurie Wallace), a blonde; Victoria Vega, a brunette; and Darian Caine, who has dark hair. Wallace is easily the most physically attractive of the lot (which is nice considering she spends the entire last half-hour wandering around in a forest without any clothes on) and also displays the most acting ability (or maybe a better way to put it would be more enthusiasm than both Vega and Caine combined). Wallace is, in fact, one of the hottest women I've seen and even her imperfections (admittedly, her posterior has quite a bit of slightly saggy skin covered with stretch marks) actually add to that "girl next door" feel, even though she's easily hotter than anyone living in my neighborhood.She gets in at least two classic moments, the first is when she and Vega are under the spell of the erotic witch and she complains about being nude on video while Vega strips Wallace's clothes off one-by-one. The second is probably the most famous scene in the entire movie, a three-minute long parody of Heather Donahue's tearful "I'm so sorry" speech, except Keane happens to be fondling her bare breast for the entire segment. Wallace also has another sexy scene where Darian strips her, all the while claiming she's only letting her do it for documentary purposes. Then they proceed to have a very lengthy lesbian session.Full-bodied brunette Victoria Vega is also quite attractive, not nearly as much as Wallace, but certainly much preferable to Darian Caine.The Erotic Witch Project most definitely could have done without the guy running around in a gorilla suit who occasionally makes grunting noises during the lesbian scenes. And hey, it probably could have even done without Darian Caine, whose constant griping and raspy voice are more annoying than sexy. Still, this is an amusing, sexy softcore flick that Blair Witch haters will probably find up their alley.rating as an actual film: D+rating as a sofctore film: A- (would have been an A with someone more attractive than Darian Caine)