The Giant Spider Invasion (1975)

Best movie of this year hands down!

Absolutely Fantastic

Exactly the movie you think it is, but not the movie you want it to be.

It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.

You've got to hand it to a guy like Bill Rebane. I mean, you can laugh at his movies all you want (or be incredibly bored by them), but the man made a living as a filmmaker with virtually no money or talent in filmmaking. The guy was a brilliant salesman. This horrible movie was a huge box office hit, it was among the fifty most successful movies of 1975. Impressive for a director with no major studio backing who shot all his features in Wisconsin rather than Hollywood.The movie itself is nearly unwatchable, but it's a great time document of how easy it used to be to find a cinema release for your movies. This is not worse than whatever you used to find at the bottom shelf at a video store, but paying good money to see this on a big screen? That's a whole different animal. Particularly because you have to wait a really long time to actually see the huge spider (which is clearly a Volkswagen with legs) the trailer promised you. Up until then you see a bunch of people that you never want to see again talk and talk and talk. By the time that thing actually shows up, you're already too numb from the tedium to even laugh at it.Bill Rebane's movies can best be enjoyed when you know all the background to them. Rebane has a charming mom&pop style of filmmaking, mom (Barbara Rebane) is even credited as the assistant director. One of his daughters 'plays' one of the huge spider's legs. He sure writes great parts for women. It's made by a cast and crew that genuinely seems to be trying to their best, it's one of those movies that seemed way more thrilling to make than it is to watch. But you can't blame Rebane, he certainly did the best he could. He made a giant spider movie with 250.000 dollars, spent a lot of time with family and friends, actually sold the thing to theatres and somehow people still talk about it more than forty years later. That alone should earn him a place in film history.

First of all, I did not see this film when it was originally released, though I would have been at exactly the right age to have my childhood completely and utterly warped by its low budget charms. I didn't see it until well into the DVD revolution, when I snapped up the disc released by Fred Olen Ray's Retromedia outfit. So my opinions are in no way colored by nostalgia. However, having grown up scarfing down the offerings of Godzilla Week and Edgar Allen Poe/Vincent Price Week on WABC-TV's "The 4:30 Movie," as well as frequent viewings of Hammer Studios product on WOR-TV, I had all the necessary childhood exposure to shlock to appreciate this work of monster mastery by the Inoshiro Honda of Cheesheads, Bill Rebane. Having continued my education thanks to the VHS and DVD revolutions, exploring further down the pile, and finally having committed the complete works of Ed Wood to memory, I was probably finally prepared to consume the cinematic leavings of Mr. Rebane.Fortunately, this was the first of Rebane's works to meet my uncomprehending eyeballs. Good move, because if I had watched any of his other productions, I don't know if I would have bothered with TGSI. Anyway, here Rebane has some actual professional Hollywood actors on hand in the form of The Skipper and that lady that played Della Street. This helps matters immensely, and believe me, Rebane needs all the help he can get. When your monster is a beat-up VW Beetle covered in black shag carpeting and bendy straws (I'm probably making it sound more convincing with that description than it actually is), you really have to make up the difference somewhere else.Anyway, the plot unfolds pretty predictably for a story like this, and we are treated to some fun, rollicking low-budget monster action. If you go into this with a way-open mind and a sense of fun, (and perhaps some adult beverages), you might find some enjoyment here. But I would stay away from Rebane's other works---"Invasion From Inner Earth," "The Legend of Bigfoot" and several others too sad to even mention.Okay, I will mention Rebane's involvement in the worst excuse for a movie ever made, "Monster-A-Go-Go," which started off as an aborted project that Rebane never completed, and was "finished" by Herschell Gordon Lewis in one of the most cynical cash grabs ever in the history of filmmaking. But Rebane is not entirely culpable on that score, so I will give him a partial break on that.

Those of you out there looking for an intelligent, well made film, don't watch this movie. In fact, don't even read this comment. However, if you're like me and like cheesy scifi and horror movies, this is the film for you. It's currently my favorite MST3K episode and even my favorite movie. Volkswagons dressed up as spiders? Hilarious? Check. Alan Hale Jr. as a tubby sheriff? Hilarious? Check. A disgusting man with a back brace who gets eaten by a giant spider's butt? Hilarious? Check. Many more hilarious things happen in this campy, surprisingly well cast "Horror" movie, but I won't spoil it for you. I can't watch this movie without falling to the floor and rolling with laughter. It never gets old! So, in conclusion, I recommend this Bill Rebane classic to anyone looking for a good laugh and a big grin.

Spiders as big as Volkswagens come to Earth and wreak havoc in a small town in this cheesy but rather enjoyable flick. The arachnids are up to no good, as is usually the case, and before long they're munching on the locals. The town's sheriff, played by Allan Hale Jr. enlists the aid of a scientist(Barbara Hale)in order to get to the bottom of all the eight legged nastiness. Unlike some B films, The Giant Spider Invasion doesn't try to hide its low budget heritage and, in this case, that works to the films' advantage. The pacing is good, the acting is restrained and the cinematography is effective more often than not. Like many other films of its type, The Giant Spider Invasion relies on your willingness to squint a bit at the watery special effects and uneven story. If you can do that, you'll have a good time.