Lovers Lane (1999)

Surprisingly incoherent and boring

Overrated

It's the kind of movie you'll want to see a second time with someone who hasn't seen it yet, to remember what it was like to watch it for the first time.

An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

Lovers Lane (1999) C-90 min. D: Jon Steven Ward. Erin J. Dean, Riley Smith, Matt Riedy, Suzanne Bouchard, Sarah Lancaster, Anna Faris, Ben Indra, Ed Bailey, Richard Sanders, Carter Roy. Mindless slasher entertainment certainly doesn't score any points for originality, but also goes against the clichéd 90s horror `self-parody' that quickly grew tiresome after SCREAM. A man who killed a couple making out on lover's lane 13 years earlier returns to wreak more havoc. The plot is more complicated than the typical slasher fare, but the film is never dull. Character development is also present here, allowing the viewers to care about the victims. The acting is good for its type (especially Dean as the heroine) and the film has more than its share of eye candy (Smith, who is hunkier than hunky). In the minus column, there is very little blood in the film until the climax and they could have come up with a more clever ending. Good grade-Z popcorn slasher fun. RATING: 6 out of 10.

Based on that old urban legend, this low-budget loser features a hook-handed killer who stuck it to a man and woman on Valentine's Day getting it on at Lover's Lane. 13 years later, his escape from the state mental hospital coincides with the murders of a bunch of obnoxious high school kids played by a hand picked cast of no-talent nobodies who resemble your favorite teen dream stars of today!See the Mena Suvari knock-off who keeps her American BEAUTY-style cheerleading uniform on for the entire movie before taking a hook to the most private of personal areas. Or Tara Reid telling Freddie Prinze, Jr. to do her or "I'll kill your f@#!@t ass!" before both get their necks slashed. And there's the Nick Carter clone with a weird mom who sometimes wears a wig and punches out a drunken teen tramp Parker Posey knock-off at a bowling alley.The killer is kept hidden in the shadows for the most part and writes scary messages like "Prison food sucks" (??) in blood on a wall. Written directly on the video is a warning about "Nudity, Graphic Violence, Strong Sexual Content and Adult Language," which adds up to a bunch of offscreen deaths and two topless scenes that are too dark to see. At least Friday THE 13TH and other 80s slasher movies didn't skimp on our basic human need for gore, nudity and action.The ridiculous ending, however, is hilarious, if you can wait that long. This was made around the Seattle area.

It was almost an enjoyable though uninspiring slasher film, but the last few minutes make so little sense it's not funny. With the number of hook-wielding lunatics apparently running around in this small town, I'm surprised there was anyone left to be a victim.

This is a dang good flick to be as unheard of as it is. It is AS good as Cherry Falls and that is a very well known flick around the horror circuit. It has a lot of slasher flick cliches, but being a slash lover, I love slasher flick cliches! Killer P.O.V , young lovers parked and getting it on, a killer with a hook. All of this is done very stylishly with an interesting young cast and one very funny cheese scene in a bathroom stall that is laugh out loud funny to grizzled slasher burnouts like myself. I predict this film will one day find a cult audience. Finding a slash diamond in the rough is dang near impossible these days, I know I have hunted every obscure horror flick I can find and most even the cult ones disappoint, with a few exceptions i.e. the burning, black christmas, my bloody valentine, house on sorority row-- those films are cool hunt them down if you can! Now lets all go down to the XXX Root Beer Stand!!! Four stars out of four.