Bloodbath at the House of Death (1984)

Perfect cast and a good story

Pretty good movie overall. First half was nothing special but it got better as it went along.

I cannot think of one single thing that I would change about this film. The acting is incomparable, the directing deft, and the writing poignantly brilliant.

Strong acting helps the film overcome an uncertain premise and create characters that hold our attention absolutely.

Bloodbath at the House of Death did have a lot of potential, a talented cast and writer and a great title being the starting points. But the execution undermines this, so in the end Bloodbath at the House of Death is a failure. It is not without redeeming merits though, the film is not badly made, Vincent Price while underused looks and sounds as though he is thoroughly enjoying himself and the Can Opener and toilet scenes are very effective. However, I just didn't find Bloodbath at the House of Death all that funny or horrifying. I do love comedy and I don't mind it when it is stupid and rude, but I've never liked it all that much when it's distasteful. And Bloodbath at the House of Death showed great distaste, the toilet humour is utterly infantile and the innuendos are incredibly smutty making the worst Carry On movie(the later entries had a lot of smut) seem tame. The dialogue is similarly unfunny, crude and somewhat stilted too, I even questioned whether Bary Cryer actually had anything to do with the writing at all. The story is very thin structurally and doesn't make any sense at all. I got the parodies but with two exceptions they seemed randomly strung together(and that is pretty much what the story was) and were too predictable and badly written to have any kind of impact. The ET parody was also rendered cheaply. The direction was leaden, and the entire cast were wasted. Only Price was good and even he deserved much better. Kenny Everett was very talented and evidently does try very hard but the quality of the humour here disallowed him to do anything interesting or fun with what he has. The rest of the cast don't make any kind of impression. All in all, a embarrassing failure for all involved. 3/10 Bethany Cox

Holy Mary Mother Of God, horror parodies can be really bad when not handled properly (see Transylvania 6,500, Saturday The 14th and Haunted Honeymoon for further reference)… and this obscure little British entry is one of the worst of the lot. Tiresome beyond belief, the makers somehow managed to persuade some talented stars to lend their faces to this garbage. Vincent Price, for example, as a 700 year old cult leader who swears a lot; Kenny Everett as a paranormal investigator who was formerly a brilliant surgeon in Germany until he accidentally dropped his monocle into a patient's insides during an operation; Pamela Stephenson as a lisping scientist who ends up getting the best sex of her life from a randy poltergeist; and Graham Stark as a blind man who inadvertently destroys everything in his path wherever he goes. On paper it sounds almost funny, but in reality sadly it never gets that far… in fact, this pitiful film is buried irretrievably several feet below rock bottom.Following the massacre of 18 people at a creepy country manor, a number of scientists visit the house in question several years later to investigate high levels of radioactivity at the site. Here they experience numerous supernatural goings-on as they try to find out what's going on. Meanwhile, a number of local villagers led by a700 year old cultist (Vincent Price) march upon the house and attempt to 'cleanse' it of the unwelcome outsiders.The plot itself doesn't hang together for a second and there's little point wasting another word trying to describe it. Instead, the film unfolds like a series of randomly connected comedy skits, sometimes poking fun at other horror films as they go. Everett hacks down a door with an axe, a la Jack Nicholson, in order to tell the girl inside that it's dinner time. Whilst walking through a dingy tunnel, one woman looks up and screams "Bat!" – a moment later a cricket bat falls down and clonks someone on the head. At one point Everett stops midway through a meal, clutches at his stomach while an alien life-form rises up inside him, then burps and excuses himself. That's the general level of humour throughout, with lots of infantile toilet humour thrown in for good measure. The film is extremely tedious and barely raises a single smile during its entire running time. Most depressing of all is the absolute waste of horror icon Price, in a role that simply has to be seen to be disbelieved. The kindest summary I can come up with is that Bloodbath At The House Of Death is about as funny as a serial rapist. Avoid.

Six scientists arrive at the creepy Headstone Manor to investigate a strange phenomena which was the site of a mysterious massacre years earlier where 18 guests were killed in one night.It turns out that the house is the place of a satanic cult lead by a minister monk who plans to kill the scientists who are inhabiting this house of Satan.....This film sounded like such a good idea on paper. Kenny Everett, one of the funniest comedians of the eighties, joined by other well known British actors, written by Barry Cryer, and featuring Vincent Price. What on earth could go wrong? Virtually everything goes wrong, bar one joke involving a musical instrument and a toilet.The story is poor, and the script is just one long list of unfunny innuendos that even a below average Carry on Film would be ashamed of.The cast do their best with the material, but it doesn't work, and the whole thing falls flat.This had so much potential too. Believe me this is one movie where the title is much better than the movie.

When you get a bad British comedy film , they don't come much worse than this inane rubbish with a great title and that's all. The star was a much loved zany DJ and comedy star who died of HIV far to young.Those of you in USA may know Pamela Stephenson as the wife of Comedian Billy Connerly,but the rest of a decent Brit comedy cast are totally wasted. This was part written by a very respected comedy writer and comedian, Barry Cryer, still making us laugh, seen at the beginning as a policeman getting covered in blood.So what went wrong? It was made at a time when sending things up was considered the done thing. The spoofs all go wrong and the whole mess seems to be mistimed,perhaps bad editing. The saddest sight is seeing Vincent Price trying to make good a bad script by addlibbing his lines. He also does not look too well.Kenny is fine and holds in his usual goofy self.I met him a couple of times, a nicer guy you could not meet. So as his film farewell iv'e been kind giving this 5, but that's for him not the dross.