Private Valentine: Blonde & Dangerous (2008)

Thanks for the memories!

The film may be flawed, but its message is not.

A film of deceptively outspoken contemporary relevance, this is cinema at its most alert, alarming and alive.

The movie is surprisingly subdued in its pacing, its characterizations, and its go-for-broke sensibilities.

I am a big anti-Simpson fan. Can't stand her, can't stand her movies. But I was very pleasantly surprised at "Private Valentine," not because it was high art or cinematic gold, but simply because it was fun, heartfelt, and managed to pull on some (albeit trite) heartstrings. For example, when Olesya Rulin's "mousy" private speaks strongly to Vivica Fox's First Sergeant "Do I look like I want to cry to you?" it was a nice payoff.There are many complaints by service personnel that the hair is not to proper length, the training sequences are not as accurate as they could be, etc etc. Does any of this matter? Of course not: this is a MOVIE, meant purely for entertainment, and it succeeds on that level.Watch it, enjoy it. Unless you only enjoy obscure Eastern European art films, you will not regret the time spent here.

There is room for a movie like this and this one is not the only movie since "Private Benjamin" that has a topic like this. Jessica Simpson is good in light comedic movies. I'm sure she would like to do something serious but this appears to be her niche at the moment. I know people think she is dumb but in all actuality I think that was a publicity hype. I remember her way back when she still had weight problems and was first emerging into the singing arena. I saw her on interviews and she is anything but stupid. She was great in this movie. The addition of Ryan Sypek as a subtle romance interest was well done.I enjoyed this movie a lot. The military was a background but no rational adult would look for accuracy in this type of movie and especially since it was one that went straight to sales. I didn't find it but watched it on television and was highly entertained. If you just want something to pass the time with good scenes and comedic acting, watch this movie. It would never win awards but some of the movies made are purely for entertainment value and not to win awards and this is that kind of movie.

I grabbed the DVD off of the local Blockbuster new release shelf. One shouldn't judge a book (or film) by the DVD cover, but I guess I'm a sucker for a hot-blonde in military uniform. I knew not to expect too much of it, and, well, that's kind of what the viewer got, but there was a bit more here than meets the eye.Years back when Goldie Hawn did Private Benjamin there was a lot of hype about the comic and comedic overtones of "Private Benjamin". But, it turned out to be a serious film with humor sprinkled in here and there. "Private Benjamin" was funny, but it wasn't light entertainment. It had some social commentary and other messages to convey to the audience. In this regard I was personally let down by "Private Benjamin", although I understand it as a quality film, and appreciate it as such."Private Valentine", on the other hand, is cut from a different cloth. It takes the Goldie Hawn film, removes the heavy undercurrent meat and replaces it with a light frothy soufflé. Jessica Simpson doesn't play the heavily laden woman nearing a conjuncture in her life, and is taken in by a more than slick military ad campaign. Simpson's character starts off as a lightweight star who wants to be taken seriously, but is not given the opportunity because of both the roles she's given, and the deeper reason of why she's given said roles. It takes Uncle Sam to turn her into "An army of one", so to speak. And a one-woman wrecking crew she becomes.Unlike Private Benjamin, the Cold War is over, so there's no "Red menace" and/or scare to play off of. The sexual tension in this film is kept light and romantic, as opposed to the expose on abuse that Hawn's film portrayed. In short, it's light entertainment. "Private Valentine" is meant to be nothing more than that.Having said this, and having a loose and tacit respect for this film, I do admit that it could have been executed better, particularly in the first act. The beginning of the film seems cobbled together, and not thoroughly vetted as it could have been. The whole movie seems to have been a bargain production, though not quite as low as a B-movie extravaganza. As such the exposition and staging are somewhat restrained.Jessica Simpson herself is actually quite good in this role. In fact, everyone does a good job, but I was particularly impressed with Simpson's acting ability, and this comment comes from a man who is not one of her fans. There was no heavy emoting to be doe here, but Simpson did show us a diverse set of acting abilities. If the directing had been tightened up a little, then this film, Simpson included, could have really shined and exceeded all expectations.As it stands now it's just light entertainment. Don't expect a remake of "Private Benjamin", because it really isn't. It takes the premise of that film, and, in a sense, turns it on its head to create something mildly enjoyable, and not overly wrought with social commentary, drama and character angst.Not a great film, but then it was never meant to be one. Just something to watch on a lazy Sunday afternoon. If you go in not expecting too much, then you should be okay with it. The only warning I'd give is that it's a proverbial chick-flick. So, to my fellow testosterone comrades, try not to be overly critical of it.Give it a shot.

Jessica Simpson stars in this film released direct to video about a movie starlet who goes from bombing in the movie industry to bombing in the Army, First Sergeant Fox on her case every inch of the way.Bomb! Bomb! Bomb! This film is so awful that I can't believe I made it all the way through. The surprising thing about this film is how bad it seems after Goldie Hawn did it almost thirty years ago. Save yourself the money, and the embarrassment of someone you know seeing this under your arm when you walk through Walmart, buying this DVD, and watch the original, "Private Benjamin." 1 out of 10 stars.