I Love You, Don't Touch Me! (1997)

I cannot think of one single thing that I would change about this film. The acting is incomparable, the directing deft, and the writing poignantly brilliant.

It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.

Like the great film, it's made with a great deal of visible affection both in front of and behind the camera.

This movie was absolutely DELIGHTFUL!!! To me, the fact that the first-time young writer-director, Ms. Julie Davis, has not received greater acceptance (i.e. WORK) in Hollywood, is a veritable TRAGEDY of Wellesian proportions!!! (i.e. "Wellesian" as in "Orson") The same holds true for the lead actress, Ms. Marla Schaffel.I especially enjoyed reports that Ms. Davis was promoting this movie at the Sundance Film Festival by passing out underwear visibly imprinted with "I Love You", but also imprinted with an "invisible" glow-in-the-dark "Don't Touch Me". (What a WONDERFUL sense of humor!!)This movie beautifully captures the essence of our search for true, meaningful love, with all of its pitfalls and dead-ends. How anyone could fail to LOVE it totally escapes me. The fact that per one reviewer, it was based in part on Ms. Davis' actual life experiences, only ADDS to its fascination. I used this movie as a "litmus test" for prospective mates: I would rent it, show it to her, and if she didn't like it, the affair was OVER!

This film shows glimmers of talent, but strikes so many false notes that film and filmmaker lose all credibility.It purports to be the story of 25-year-old, Katie, who -- although the product of what she views as the perfect relationship -- is so scarred by an early boyfriend's infidelity that she remains a virgin. One can only pray that, like many early film-making efforts, this isn't autobiographical.This same repressed virgin has, as close friends, an exuberant (read, promiscuous) party girl and a buttoned-down perfectionist, neither of whom she appears to like very much. Her best friend, though, is the companionable Ben, who loves her, but whom she cannot picture in any romantic role. This doesn't stop her from a certain dog-in-the-manger attitude that arises after she sets him up with her party-girl pal.This same repressed virgin, who believes sex without love is meaningless, gives it all up to a suave older man who has already made it abundantly clear to her that he goes through women like some go through dental floss.None of these situations are unbelievable *per se*, but the writer-director gives none of them the space to develop naturally. We're supposed to believe that the suave older lover who has literally said and done ALL the right things throughout the relationship, would suddenly make a video-related misstep so monumental as to send the relationship down the path to its inevitable end. We're greeted with a behind-closed-doors wedding day revelation in the relationship of the perfectionist friend and her new husband that gets no set-up nor explanation. Katie, an aspiring singer, is deemed too out-of-touch to be able to convey emotion when auditioning for an egg jingle, but manages to put over a smoldering torch song a few days later, while in the same virginal state (although she IS feeling tempted, for apparently the first time). Katie's own change-of-heart, at film's end, receives the same spliced-in treatment. The film is very talky, which would be all right if the dialogue were believable, but mostly we're treated to Katie's self-righteous rants. It's hard to believe anyone would be friends with this neurotic prig.Davis, the writer-director, shows some visual and conceptual talent in the film, but should probably stick to interpreting the visions of more gifted and insightful writers. The entire film smacked of film-school project, which still isn't really enough to redeem it.

This film harkens back to a time long past. About five minutes into the movie, I started thinking about my film school days, watching the sad projects of my classmates and trying to think of something nice to say about them. I couldn't find much here. This is about the quality of a 3rd year film school major, right before they drop out to study television. Everything seemed familiar, as if I'd seen it all before in a better movie, and downright unbelievable. At one point, the main character happens upon her cheating boyfriend in bed with another woman in the middle of the day. There's nothing new here. Even the staging seems a copy. First I wonder, are they living together? Well, she's a virgin so probably not. Then, why is she barging into her boyfriend's apartment without knocking. Or, maybe it's her apartment, but what idiot would bring home another woman to his girlfriend's apartment in the middle of the day. She storms out. Of course, the boyfriend grabs a ridiculous object to cover his groin as he runs out after her. In this case, it's a stuffed animal. He runs after her, yelling, "it was an accident!" Huh?The main character just doesn't seem all that interesting. She says (I'm paraphrasing), "Why can't I find a guy with a strong sense of himself, a large penis, and a large wallet." Wow, do women really tell other women stuff like that? I guess I've been giving them too much credit. My girlfriend says they don't. Who cares.

Here's another of those comedy/dramas about a single twentysomething woman wondering why her relationships don't work and why her life isn't what she wants. If that doesn't sound like your type of film I'd stay away because if anything our heroine in this one seems a little more neurotic than usual. But if it does sound like your thing, stick with this one, it gets better as it goes along.Katie (Marla Schaffel) is 25 and conflicted, to say the least, about her desire to terminate her virginity. Writer/director Judy Davis leads us through all the ups and downs on her rocky road, and it's a mostly fine effort.