Alien Abduction: Intimate Secrets (1996)

Don't listen to the negative reviews

A Masterpiece!

It's a good bad... and worth a popcorn matinée. While it's easy to lament what could have been...

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

Danny Elfman composed the music score for this? huh? where the heck did that guy get that information? he even said he was a video store clerk. guess they don't care much about movie facts in..where? Hannibal Lecter Missouri or something? dunno. but no. Danny Elfman had nothing to do with this. i don't even know where he got that idea. weird.like this movie. weird. it's a soft core porn chick flick about alien abduction. it's actually not all that bad and a cut above most of the boring soft core blab i've seen on the subscription channels. i don't really like pornography or soft core, but like Georgie Wash, i cannot tell a lie, i've seen 'em. my brother loves porno. for a period of time it seems like thats all he was ever watching. when my mother had ShowTime, he used to come over and watch the soft core stuff which is how i ended up seeing so much soft core s--t.no no. don't say yeah sure. i really try to stay away from this stuff. i like movies that really tell a story, and let's get real, porno, even the soft core stuff, hardly ever tells adequate stories or plots. that's why this was a little more interesting than most, it actually attempted to tell a real story line.not to say there wasn't a lot of nudity. mostly all women. since i happen to be gay, that was pretty boring. my brother is straight so that was just fine with him.i thought the alien stuff and the whole missing link in the story line was interesting. i also thought that the portrait that turned out to be the girl watching was kind of eerie. not bad. too much sex stuff though. too much of the girls not enough of the guys.i actually own this movie on video tape. i ordered a different 'Alien Abduction' that wasn't a soft core porn flick, but the stupid seller got the titles confused and sent us this one by mistake. my porno loving brother liked this so much we decided to keep it. he would definitely rate this a thumbs up. being porno detached myself, it's okay.

Soft core movie from Full Moon's Twilight division. Basically Meredyth Holmes thinks there is more to life than sex but then thanks to an alien visitor (who of course is a studly guy) she realises she might have been wrong. Fairly entertaining, good production and score (by Reg Powell). Largely well acted and Holmes is much prettier than the the usual cast of such fare though her main erotic scene is a long way coming - largely due to the fact that all her friends have to recount their own sexual adventures and escapades in order to get her in the mood. These short tales are a little tedious but each is different with a western scene, some bondage and various other things.

A guilty pleasure I have seen several times in late night cable, I confess my high rating for this sexy flick (calling it soft-core maybe a bit too much, since there is not that much nudity in it) cannot be explained or defended in a rational way. Four beautiful babes in a sauna, as they describe their somewhat similar fantasies, slowly realize they have been abducted by a not too handsome alien in the past. Shot in Romania, the cast includes Playboy centerfold Pia Reyes (sorry, but the voluptuous and surgically enhanced are not my type) but the one who gets more screen time is blonde unknown Meredyth Holmes, who is really very beautiful. The unknown redhead (probably a Romanian given her accent) is really cute, too.

Until "Alien Abduction" there was a considerable unbridged distance between your basic high-end "soft core" movie and your basic poorly written/generally unwatchable feature (insert "Zoolander" here). "Alien Abduction" successfully links the two categories. Whether that is a good thing is up to the viewer.How I ended up watching this thing is more interesting than anything in the movie. Since the movie failed to attract much of an audience when released, its title was changed. The original title of "Alien Abduction: Intimate Secrets" was prefixed with "Forbidden Zone" which causes it to be confused with Susan Tyrell's cult classic "Forbidden Zone". Even the IMDb is confused and when you click the Amazon VHS link for "Forbidden Zone" you end up with "Alien Abduction". So trusting souls like myself end up owning a copy of something unlikely to ever be considered a cult classic.Not that it is a total loss, the missing link thing is kind of interesting and it is also interesting that this was pretty much an acting career killer for the five very attractive women featured in this film. Not that they exhibited much acting talent. Former Playboy centerfold Pia Reyes is probably the best to the lot. Meredyth Holmes gets the most screen time and has one of those strange faces that looks gorgeous when framed by a hat and rather ordinary otherwise (maybe her horrible haircut and dye job). Darcy Demoss has a lot more mileage on her than the other four and you wonder what she is doing in this thing. This was the last movie appearance for several of them and the remaining ones were out of the business a couple years later.The story is totally uninteresting which is unfortunate because the women are attractive and non-plastic. They spend most of their time in a sauna (shot in Romania) engaged in girl banter with towels wrapped around them. They describe passionate fantasies to each other that somehow fail to be passionate when cut in as flashbacks. It would have been nice if something sexy or erotic took place in these sequences but it doesn't. There is some amusement value in the fact that these sequences are staged on sets that were obviously created for other movies (the budget must have all gone for salaries). There is an alien subplot but no one should care much about it because even the characters treat it listlessly.At least Pia Reyes' fans will enjoy watching her.