Zonad (2013)

Perfect cast and a good story

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

Good movie, but best of all time? Hardly . . .

It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.

My sweet jayzuz! In only 75 minutes this pea-brain adolescent wreck seeks to cut the legs out from under the long-deserved Irish rep as a country of endearing, witty and artful storytellers.One of the worst movies I have ever seen (and I am an ancient, so I have seen plenty). After watching the entire film because my beloved wife wouldn't give up on it, I could only think: boring, sophomoric, witless, crude, poorly acted, jam packed with the requisite "dirty words" and pissing sequences... Great gawd almighty, wot has become of motion picture culture??? Have ye no shame, ye "Irish" poseurs? But then I read something here or on Netflix indicating that this production should be seen as a parody of American teenage gross-out movies. Oh, OK, now I get it: a witless parody of a witless genre! Right. Seen like this, I guess it is a masterpiece.Do yourself a favor, forget this empty glass. Go make a friend at the pub around the corner and raise a glass and sing a dirge to the Irish wit of yore.

Zonad is probably an alien. What other explanation could there be for finding a red, leather-clad man passed out on your living room floor? So the charade begins. The ruse is obvious to us of course because everything about Zonad is just plain stupid, and funny.This film finds an hilarious way to tackle naiveté vs. experience, alcoholism vs. sobriety, and mankind vs extraterrestrials. All the characters had such amusing, naive character traits, that it is more fun to accept Zonad than not. It was surprising how easy it was for made up aliens to get laid, but such is the way of life in Ballymoran, Ireland.If you enter this town, you will need to fall for the sexual and musical charms of Zonad and his fellow alien, Bonad, otherwise you will find yourself on the outside of the city limits with no way back in. "Zonad" is recommended for those that like the quirky charms of small Irish towns mixed with the alcohol-induced and sexually-laced jokes for American audiences but written with the smart and adept skill of small, independent filmmakers.

Zonad might not get the appreciation from the description, but this movie was a pleasant surprise. I thought the reality created by the Carney Brothers was refreshing, lite, and enjoyable. At no point did I want to reject that ignorance and acceptance of the space visitor by the towns people, which is a credit to the writing, direction, and performances.Janice Byrne enticed at every opportunity as the "precocious" and "sexually-frustrated" Jenny, giving Simon Delaney ample moments to shine in his claimed naivete. Delaney, as Zonad, exceeded all expectations, which there were none, so he gets many exaltations. The minor characters added enough charm and quaint towny-vibe to cause no distrust of them. Bonad's addition was a comic gem, the perfect antagonist for this piece. Donna Dent even sold her flirtatious motherly role very well.Technically, there was nothing remarkable, but the cocaine induced speed up produce a chuckle along with the song choice.Overall, nice zany moments, and a comedy worth watching.

This film has received mixed reviews in the press. Either you "get it", it seems, or you don't. I was definitely amused. The film creates a milieu all of its own; a cross between 1950's California and "traditional" Ireland. Some have criticised the setting as being too incredible, in which case they are taking it all too seriously. There are some things that might have been done better. I don't think the production values were great. I didn't like the picture quality, the lighting wasn't great (night scenes in particular were very murky, daytime interior scenes were spoiled by the windows being completely washed out). Perhaps a lot of this is down to the fact that the Carney Brothers change things a lot on the hoof, making it difficult for every one else to keep up. Too bad. Maybe they just need more experience.Film does miss a few tricks. There was plenty of room to explore how the main protagonists came by their original costumes. Just a few comic touches would have made a difference. They could have be shown literally digging their way out of the rehab institute(a parody of Shawshank Redemption comes to mind). Just simply overlaying the sound of distant baying hounds over their escape through the forest would have been funny. Other things. It could have been funnier, with a little more work, or perhaps more people to work on the script. The boxing match could have been funnier too; there's a whole genre of boxing movies just begging to be parodied, but not here.Good performances all round. Pearse was very good, and in fact I wonder what it would have been like if he had the lead part. He's a funny guy, and savvy with it. That's not to take anything away from Delaney.Unfortunately (I sigh) as is so often the case with Irish movies, film is let down by unnecessary crudity. There was no need for the faux-choc use of the F word to describe what Zonad was doing to the women of Ballymoran (they should have gone all the way, by the way, and called it Ballymorawn); it would have been much funnier for the characters to say he was riding them. Also, I didn't think that the cop p*ssing all over some of the main characters was all that funny (believe me, it looks funnier here in print than it is on the screen. It would have been much funnier if they at least made the victims completely sopping, drenched/soaked through). The scene where a major character invites his girlfriend to gargle with his balls (among other intimate invitations) wasn't funny at all. These shenanigans serve only to reduce the audience for the film. The Oirish penchant for having somebody p*ssing or sh*tting at some point is fully indulged, of course.Film may be especially interesting to some sections of the American audience interested in Ireland and the Irish. There is a saying; "many a true word is said in jest". Zonad is a big joke (in the best sense) but the insights it gives are all the more true for it, bigger and more colorful than they might otherwise be.