Candy Stripers (2006)

Thanks for the memories!

Don't listen to the Hype. It's awful

Captivating movie !

It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.

Candy Stripers is just plain horrible, and not in a scary way, even by B-movie or Z-movie standards. In case you were curious, the title refers to the female hospital volunteers in the US that wore white uniforms with red stripes. With a title like that, you would expect some stripping and nudity, there's not much of it here on display except a couple of quick breast shots, nothing really past the half-way point. It feels and plays like a cheap TV show with an extremely low budget, kind of a B-movie Goosebumps for teens. It takes place mostly in a hospital slowly being "overrun" by sexually aggressive women possessed by slugs. I actually make it sound better than it is.The writing is lame, the dialogue is cliché, and it doesn't even have those wonderfully corny one-liners you usually get in that type of movie. The acting is laughable and doesn't even reach TV soap quality, which would have been nice here actually. Worse, you have 2 of the main guys, supposedly teenagers, that are balding. The special effects are pathetic, and not even funny pathetic, just cheap-looking and bad (especially the distortion CGI effect when the "creatures" die). The suspense and enjoyment are non-existent, and the movie felt twice as long as it actually is. And this is from someone who usually enjoys those kind of movies as long as there's some cleverness, enthusiasm and talent behind it. This review is already too long for such a piece of manure. Don't get suckered by the cover art. Don't expect good titillation, gore or fun. Don't pay for it, don't even watch it for free. If you already did, then you now understand what I meant. You want something good in the same vein, rent Lesbian Vampire Killers instead.

If "Decoys" was "Species" for horny teenagers, then "Candy Stripers" is "Decoys" for... Heck, I don't know. All I know is, I was kind of deeply disappointed with this one. The only thing it delivers, is some naked boobies from some extremely delicious babes, and some girl/girl kissing (which could be described as 'not your average kinda tongue-action'). Things that the movie fails to deliver: Good acting, tension, surprise-twists, great effects, good cinematography, and above all... a plot! Oh well, I've seen worse. Might be fun if you're in a very undemanding mood (in which I was when I saw it, so I don't regret the watch).

In a lonely road in Wucaipa, something attacks the driver of a car and her blind friend Tammy (Sarah Ball). They have a car accident; Tammy survives and is sent to the Wucaipa General Hospital. Meanwhile, a high school basketball team fights with the opponents in the square and the captain Matt (Brian Lloyd) with a broken leg, and his injured friends Joey (William Edwards Jr.) and Brian (Kevin Thomas Fee) are sent to the same hospital. Tammy is near death and asks the candy striper nurse Janine (Deanna Brooks) to kiss her. While kissing as a gesture of sympathy, an alien invades the mouth of Janine and infects her; she infects others nurses, clerks, doctors and patients, initiating an exponential virus outbreak in the hospital. Joey's sister Cherie (T. White) that has a crush on Matt stays with them in the hospital. When Joey is infected by a hot nurse during the night, he has webbing on the face and rush, and Matt asks Cherie to call his girlfriend Krystal (Nicole Rayburn) to help them to leave the hospital. But the place is under quarantine and the candy strippers need sugar to procreate a breed of alien.The B-movie "Candy Stripers" recalls those movies from the 50's, more specifically "Invasion of the Body Snatchers", but spiced with erotic scenes and really hot actresses, highlighting the playmate Deanna Brooks and the sexy good actress Nicole Rayburn of "Kisses and Caroms". The story is flawed, this low-budget movie is not the eighth wonder of the world and will not be nominated to the Oscar, but the IMDb User Rating is very unfair, maybe due to prejudice against the gorgeous and sexy playmates. I found "Candy Stripers" a very entertaining and funny film. My vote is six.Title (Brazil): "Hospital Macabro" ("Macabre Hospital")Note: On 16 August 2015, I saw this movie again.

Candy Stripers starts as friends Matt (Brian Lloyd), Joey (William Edwards Jr.) & Brian (Kevin Thomas Fee) are injured in a basketball game. They are taken to a local hospital where it is discovered Matt has hurt his leg so is left in traction, Joey has a suspected broken wrist & Brian, well is just hurt. They all begin the road to recovery but Matt senses something strange is going on in the hospital, there appears to be some odd web like substance covering everything & all the candy stripers have been taken over by some slimy alien parasite thing for reasons which are never explained. Matt & his mates consider it their duty to rid the world of these alien parasites on their own because, well I don't actually.Co-produced, co-written & directed by Kate Robbins I have to say that Candy Stripers is a pretty good damned poor film. The one notable aspect about Candy Stripers (apart from being total crap) is that the main creative force behind it were women, according to the credits Candy Stripers was written, produced & directed by women which only proves women can make a horror film as badly as any man. The script by Robbins & Jill Garson is awful, the sci-fi horror story is poorly thought out, developed & deeply unsatisfying. For a start the hospital in Candy Stripers is very underpopulated, where are all the patients & Doctors? They seem to have an over abundance of good looking candy stripers but in terms of patients & proper medical staff they have problems. Then there's the question I kept asking myself about where the hell were all the authorities? Since these candy stripers were killing everyone did the local police not think they should take action against them? The plot is sluggish & makes little sense, the character's are clichéd & do the most stupid things & the dialogue is awful.Director Robbins does nothing to convince me women should be allowed to make films, I'm sorry but that's the way it is. She keeps the film moving along at a reasonably pace but it's all so poor, stupid & so far removed from reality it's impossible to be scared by it. There isn't even that much gore, there are a couple of poorly handled ripped out hearts, someone gets their head ripped off & someone gets shot in the forehead. The CGI computer effects are OK, the way the makers show the hospital blowing up at the end is to have the screen flash white! Those expecting lots of nudity & sex forget it, this is very tame & features little in the way of nudity. I live in the UK & to be honest I've never heard of the term candy striper, in truth I have absolutely no idea what a candy striper is or what they are supposed to do. We simply don't have them over here. One more thing, if you make it that far keep watching the end credits as there are some outtakes & behind the scenes fun footage.Technically the film is strictly straight-to-video/DVD quality, it's alright but bland & forgettable with cheap looking special effects. Apparently shot in Los Angeles. The acting sucks too.Candy Stripers is another poor low budget rubbishy sci-fi horror film that doesn't satisfy in any department. If you enjoy watching crap films then Candy Stripers is for you, otherwise steer clear of it. Not good.