Buying the Cow (2002)

Load of rubbish!!

Boring

It is not deep, but it is fun to watch. It does have a bit more of an edge to it than other similar films.

This is a must-see and one of the best documentaries - and films - of this year.

David Collins (Jerry O'Connell) lives with his girlfriend of five years Sarah (Bridgette Wilson-Sampras) in L.A. She's transferring to NYC and gives him a "deadline". She was inspired by their perpetual single friend Tyler Carter Bellows (Ron Livingston) suddenly getting engaged. She leaves and gives him two months to decide. She spends her time in NYC with friends Nicole (Annabeth Gish), Tyler, and boss Andrew Hahn. David wonders if she's the one and searches for that feeling he once had (with an underage girl) and a new mystery woman. His single best friends Mike Hanson (Ryan Reynolds) and Jonesy (Bill Bellamy) are not always helpful. He reconnects with college ex turned stripper Amy (Alyssa Milano).Writer/director Walt Becker brings along his Van Wilder star to spice up this rambling single-guy comedy. It's too bad that he's not the lead. He's the funniest part of this movie as spiderman. Jerry O'Connell doesn't have the same boyish charm. He's more of a best friend sidekick. The B story following Sarah in NYC adds nothing. This cast of actors has great potential but the material is not quite there.

This movie is my favorite. It has so many truths and is hilarious. I recommend to any guy. It helps explain relationships. It also faces everyday problems with dating and finding the one. A must see for anyone between the ages of 20 - 40. Has some great characters kind of like Tomcats. The guy from Office Space, and others. If you like comedies you will love this movie. THere are a lot of one liners too that are very funny. Ryan Renolds is great too. I like how they explain dating problems and finding "the one". THe movie flows very well especially when Ryan thinks he is gay!lol and the flashbacks at the airport.

There is no way for me to accurately convey how terrible this movie is, but I will try. Buying the Cow is one of those movies that you never knew existed and upon discovering wished that you could altogether forget, but can't because it is such a wonderful example of what people should not do with studio money. Aside from the lackluster plot, stock characters and painfully unfunny bathroom jokes which seem to run rampant throughout the movie (most of which are so belabored as to remove the possibility of eliciting even a measly chuckle) there is something so weary about the movie that you begin to wonder if it may have been written by an Old Hollywood heavyweight trying to make a comeback in the new century and only succeeding in poorly rehashing the old jokes and stereotypes that made him successful forty or more years ago.

Just when I thought I'd seen the worst teen-oriented romantic comedies... this baby hits me. And when I say hit, I mean like a dropkick to my stomach. You may think you've seen it all, but you haven't seen this... and you should consider yourself lucky. Like Walt Becker's previous directing attempt(which was about as big of a train-wreck as this one), this features Ryan Reynolds and has incredibly poor taste in humor and will disgust just about everyone who watches it, at one point or another. Granted, this isn't as sick or graphic as Van Wilder, but it's every bit as poor. Becker decides that his talentless direction isn't enough to torture us poor viewers, and tried to write the script for this mess. Luckily, he co-wrote it with Peter W. Nelson... who doesn't seem to have written another movie neither before nor since. I don't think I have to tell you just how poorly written the film is, as the direct result of this. The love story is contrived, sappy and unbelievably predictable. The acting is just bad. The characters are never credible, their actions make no conceivable sense and all of them are paper-thin stereotypes. The humor is so painfully obvious and stupid that I can't see anyone finding it funny. The jokes are poorly set up, never funny, and repeated to the point where we're sick of them. There's only one good thing about this movie, and it's Alyssa Milano as a stripper. If you consider that reason enough to see the movie, then be my guest. Lord knows that was the only reason I gave the movie any chance at all. I recommend this to fans of romantic teen comedies and Alyssa Milano. Anyone else shouldn't bother. In fact, if you doubt you would like it, then don't watch it. It's most likely not worth your time. 5/10