Leeches! (2003)

i must have seen a different film!!

How sad is this?

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

When a person tunes in, rents or (God forbid) buys a film called "Leeches!", the expectation really should not be that the film is going to provide a deep, thought-provoking experience. However, one would hope that at least it will be entertaining and, on that score, the film perhaps partially succeeds, if on a very modest level. The story concerns a bunch of college swimmers and their girlfriends who are adversely affected by the title creatures who have become larger and more aggressive than usual thanks to having fed off the steroid-infested blood of some of the guys. While a couple of the guys wrestle with whether or not to even use steroids, the leeches have already seen the benefits of the stuff and have set about killing as many nubile and hunky teens as they can! In what is an obvious take off on the old creature feature films of the 50's and 60's, another layer of story is added by having one or more of the cast members involved in duplicitous schemes involving the wonder substance. What sets this film apart from the standard "violent monster on the loose" flick is the blatant and unusual focus on all the male physiques in the film. Yes, there are some girls present and they are in decent enough shape, but the camera virtually ignores them while fetishistically ogling the young, fit male cast members who appear in Speedos, board shorts and underwear and who seem to take their clothes off every time they enter a room! The panning shots linger on the men's perfectly toned chests and torsos (though, oddly, coyly cutting away when nearing the crotches) and roam up their legs when the men are in bed. It's all quite ridiculous, but intentionally so. Even more ridiculous is that when these guys are being attacked by the giant leeches, they consist of, in many cases, an oven mitt-like glove operated by someone's hand! So these hunky young men are basically being felt up and molested by a guy with a rubber mitt on his hand, posing as a leech (they could have left off the gloves and called this "Letches!" just as easily!) The script for the film is quite bad, despite the pedigree of the author having worked for Fangoria magazine. The acting is, at times, atrocious, though a few of the participants have managed to work again, some fairly successfully. The worst performance in the film actually comes from an adult, the heavily accented and exceedingly poor Carroccio as the swim coach. The hunk deemed to be the nerd of the group is delineated as such in no other way than that he wears thick-rimmed, dark glasses in his first and last scenes! Novel idea… The special effects, to use the term loosely, are proudly done the old-fashioned way, meaning that no CGI was used. However, they're handled so cheaply and sloppily that the result is never convincing. Frequently, it's very obvious that rubber leeches are being pulled by fishing line and often the leeches are bone dry when a little Karo syrup may have made them look appropriately slimy. Speaking of sloppy, one guy who is taking a shower alone in his home is later clearly shown wearing flesh-toned underwear during it. Many elements, however, are surprisingly good for a film made in 6 (count 'em) days! The lighting, cinematography, editing and music are not that far below the standards of a mid-level feature film. Unfortunately, the bad far outweighs the good here, though it may make some fans of bad movies smile a few times or, perhaps, arouse gay men who don't get out much.

Yes, this movie is ridiculous. Yes, it's does have a vaguely gay-porno-film vibe. Even the freakish monster-leeches are phallic, despite simultaneously looking like oven mitts. Still, the homo-erotic aspects of the film remain more implicit than explicit, so that you find yourself looking around the room asking everyone else: Does anybody else think this is a little . . . queer? By the end of the film, there's really not much doubt about whether the filmmakers intended it to be screened as such, but it's the process of enjoying every bizarre moment of innuendo that makes this film a winner. I should also mention that for a horror movie, it's less scary than just hokey, but some of us get a kick out of that. I highly recommend this film to horror fans who enjoy the opportunity to make politically/socially subversive readings of film texts--because your work is pretty much done for you.

I'm not quite sure what to say other than this was quite possibly the worst movie I have ever seen. I felt, after watching it, that years had been sucked from my very life. It made me want to cry out and put my fist through the television. This movie is so terrible, its not even good enough to criticize a la Mystery Science Theatre. Save yourself, avoid this film. The special effects are below mediocre, the plot is simple enough for a young child, the scenes of "tension and fear" make one want to wretch at the, not even joke of an attempt at horror. The camera work can only be tolerated by someone with high motion sickness capacity, and the script, the script must have been shot out of Hell itself. This movie belongs at the bottom of a lake.

This is a specific target market: Gay men who love Horror films. It is not for woman who like seeing the flesh of men at all. Directed by super la cheapo David DeCoteau, who could bring any movie under budget. And it is not for heterosexual fans of horror either. Period! I have David's entire collection of these types of films. I surprise my friends with one every once in a while and they swoon. They love them! Someone -- with a sense of humor -- is actually smart enough to produce them and I'll bet they make a bundle. There is a market for this. It is not necessary to rip it apart. Yes. From the onset, anyone familiar with these films, (Voodoo Academy, Brotherhood et al.) knows what they're in for. Hot stupid guys with great asses running around in their underwear. The plots vary but who cares, the dialogue is straight from the 1950s Drive-In fare.My favorite in this film, is the Leech coming up the leg of a sleeping hunk, right up to his lower ass, the Leech rears it's head and it looks like he's gonna plunge into the guy's . . . . I was laughing so hard. Alright, serious business here. David, please, please, please can't we have a couple of hot butt shots (naked)!! So. Hot studs. Underwear. Crazy plot. Acting not so good. DeCoteau's dazzling and interesting camera shots. What's not to like??