1313: Billy the Kid (2012)

The Worst Film Ever

The performances transcend the film's tropes, grounding it in characters that feel more complete than this subgenre often produces.

The plot isn't so bad, but the pace of storytelling is too slow which makes people bored. Certain moments are so obvious and unnecessary for the main plot. I would've fast-forwarded those moments if it was an online streaming. The ending looks like implying a sequel, not sure if this movie will get one

what a terribly boring film. I'm sorry but this is absolutely not deserving of best picture and will be forgotten quickly. Entertaining and engaging cinema? No. Nothing performances with flat faces and mistaking silence for subtlety.

1313: BILLY THE KID is another in an interminable series of straight-to-video gay erotica features shot on the cheap and at speed by former B-movie director David DeCoteau. This one's a western that has no historical accuracy whatsoever; the whole thing is coloured with an annoying sepia filter which other than a few cowboy hats is the only thing to make it look historical. As usual for this series, a bunch of buff, topless guys wander around and deliver some very wooden lines, while an inordinate amount of time is spent on having half-naked guys tied to beds and the like. It's crass and completely stupid.

1313 Productions are homoerotic given no shirts or just underwear. film depending. The tone for the film is much different than other 1313 films as it is dealing with a true historical figure and is set between his escape from Lincoln and his eventual and debated death at Ft Sumner July 14, 1881.I will forego the vast number of errors within the film except for visible wall sockets and light switches inside the house.Billy had a sharp mind, wit and a talent of getting out of dangerous situations. Brandon conveyed that aspect along with the character's tenacity and seductive abilities.

From the first moment of this film, in my head I heard the director thinking, "Hey, guys. Let's use a yellow filter (although I think s/he was really aiming for sepia-tone, which has more of a brownish tint) to give this flick a genu-wine old west feel. What do ya say?"The guy walking through the desert (for 8 solid minutes without uttering a word or doing anything interesting whatsoever other than hold his left arm in a death grip) is clean. He is absolutely devoid of dust and any sign of sunburn. The desert is dry and dusty by nature and the sun is relentlessly beating down for hours, yet this man is filth free and not sunburned?Why is he walking around wearing a vest (with historically inaccurate side-cinching ties) without a shirt on? In the read old west, he would have been considered inappropriately dressed as his nipples, belly button, and bare chest can be seen. Think of the women! What a scandal to cause a woman to swoon. The hat he is wearing looks like a child's costume hat. Lastly, black skinny jeans did not exist in 1881.The whole walking through the desert scene could have been cut down to less than a minute and have achieved much the same effect.Croatoan? Really?! What does a reference to the lost colony of Roanoke Island, VA have to do with anything?There was no need to have the dream sequence of watching an Indian run through the woods and duck under tree branches for a solid minute.Lottie should have her hair in a respectable updo. Respectable women in the 1880s did not wear their hair down in public or in front of strangers. The light fixture in Henry/Billy's boarding room at Lottie's is clearly a ceiling-mounted electric light. Tiled islands/bars were not standard in kitchens in the late 19th century. Modern door handles and closures can be seen on all of the doors. Henry would swelter if he were really wearing thermal long john pants.A blacksmith would not likely be stupid enough to work shirtless. Flying embers, fire, and molten metal are dangerous. The more layers between his skin and the item he is working on, the better. Blacksmith aprons are very long covering most of the chest and legs and are always made of thick, protective leather; not a flimsy cloth thing that hangs low on the chest.Seriously? Is every man in this movie shirtless or does the director just have a male nipple fetish?So what's going on with the disembodied voice?Okay, we get it. Henry/Billy is tied to his bed and cannot free himself. We don't need five minutes of film time to understand this concept.Air conditioning/heating vents in the ceiling reveal that the house is modern as does the cast-concrete patio furniture, upholstered modern sofa outside, plastic flower pots, spice rack, cabinetry, bendable desk lamp, and the sliding glass doors/windows. To the left of the boarding house's front door, a burlap throw has been thrown over a flat screen TV on a media stand. How do I know? Easy. In a previous scene, someone neglected to conceal it. It looks like very little attempt to conceal modernity and/or stay true to the time period was made. Blame the low budget, but it's really hard for me, a History minor, to ignore all of the historical inaccuracies.I'm pretty sure patent leather Doc Marten's did not exist in 1881, blacksmith dude.Seriously, that's how it ends? Lame. What a waste of time.This movie does have one redeeming quality: the guys playing Billy the Kid and the former sheriff are very attractive and physically fit.