Locusts: The 8th Plague (2005)

To me, this movie is perfection.

As Good As It Gets

It is not deep, but it is fun to watch. It does have a bit more of an edge to it than other similar films.

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

Locusts: The 8th Plague is really, really bad. Now, many of these CGI-laden creature/disaster films have a goofy charm and are endearingly awful, but Locusts: The 8th Plague is simply spirit-sappingly dreadful. The plot is formulaic and there is no energy in any of the performances (but given the script, I can't say that I could find the strength or will to pull out top-drawer thesping, so they all have my sympathies and I give them the courtesy of remaining unnamed within this missive). Of course, one does not watch a film like Locusts: The 8th Plague for the actors, but the dread and thrilling insect threat, and so, do the winged fiends deliver? No, they do not. For the most part, the locusts are just indistinct shapes flitting across the screen, or rubbery insect carcasses lying about (or splattered ones on various windshields). Furthermore, the swarm is not that immense, yet the winged critters still have the power to send their victims flying in the air when only a handful crash into them. In this regard, they seem to be jet-propelled. Now, this could be a further element of their DNA tinkering, but that is probably giving the film a degree of inventiveness that it does not possess. In terms of action, when the team seek and (easily) find the elusive locust nest, the fact that they have brought guns and not enough flamethrowers makes one doubt their professional qualifications. For instance, the lead character, Vicky, bravely goes into the locusts' lair armed with only a pistol. Now, I'm no locust-busting expert, but I strongly suspect that a handgun is not going to be very effective against a horde of flesh-eating locust (loci?), and you would think that one of the intrepid crew would point this out. As for set-pieces, well, there is a fairground attack, but it raises more laughs than terror. However, there is Catatonic Boy, and Catatonic Boy will stir your emotions (it might only (probably) be your mirth centre, though), and one must not forget the Old Testament proselytising Preacher, whose biblical warnings of apocalyptic doom still continue as he becomes a locust banquet. Now that's dedication to the Lord! In terms of visuals, the CGI is really poor (the titular locusts, and especially the laughable helicopters in flight), and our hero, Colt, is not the most commanding figure that I have ever seen in such movies (where is Doug McClure when you need him?). Finally, the solution to the aerial menace is something that the nefarious creators of the mutated schistocerca gregaria could have figured out and executed themselves, and thus saved a lot of shredding time (and, of course, the numerous bodies feasted upon by the voracious and gregarious short-horned grasshoppers). So, while some bad movies deliver a myriad of pleasures, this one is just a pest.

I could have written all this off as just a mediocre low budget flick, passably entertaining if expectations are kept under control.Others have amply covered the many defects in plot holes, lousy special effects, uninspired acting, etc.However the movie went beyond all this into a pathetic attempt to turn itself into a morality play. The demons of the Greenies were summoned forth: Evil corporations. Greedy executives. Genetic manipulation. Pollution. Arrogant military. There is even a special lecture on global warming inserted lest we miss the point. (They did blessedly overlook **rrrradiation** (sound klaxon) and skipped the talking points on the blessings of tofu cakes.)And of course standing against this onslaught of evil we have Mr. Organic Pesticide Researcher, a wholesome, idealistic young man trying only to save the world for Green. And his side kick, a low level USDA employee who in one of the truly hilarious moments in the film, is given the crucial decision as to whether to approve the use of a special military unit to prevent the locusts from wiping out half of Idaho. Only if she 'signs off' can the special unit be used! Incredibly, this is a fulcrum in plot development. It's like asking someone at the airline ticket counter whether flights should be grounded on 9-11.Oh well. If you are desperate for science fiction material and have burned your way through just about everything else, this one at least has an unusual creature villain. Other than that, there are better ways to waste time than this phony Green Morality play from the Truly Clueless.

The attack scenes and carnage left is particularly nauseating and there's David Keith once again playing the main villain. I've seen him in at least two other Sci-Fi channel movies this weekend. Give this guy rest or a casting against type! It's yet another show done by the sci-fi numbers including but not limited to: a dumb jock military group (God has any of these writers seen Aliens???) coming in with the common sense of one eighth of an amoeba's's brains and messing up the situation all the more and the two leads the only ones with all the sense and all the answers. Once again we have the villains who have the answers and won't care to provide jack-squat any. Well, God provided me with a remote. I've seen this film in it's entirety once before and don't have the endurance to watch it again.

The Sci-Fi Channel has once again cranked out another "made for TV" movie in their tired formula of species versus human engagements. As the film title indicates, the locusts have the honor of being man's nemesis this time.A good director, cast, crew, writer, et al could have made this a passable piece of entertainment, but alas not in this case. The writing is predictable. The editing and photography are generic. The special effects are far, far from special. These scenes are particularly disappointing for a science fiction movie. While acceptable for a student film or a sci-fi spoof, they lack believability and appear to indicate a project with a meager budget.David Keith does a good job as Gary Wolf, the corporate head. He has become a staple of The Sci-Fi Channel's flicks. Among this swarm of bad acting, he is a welcome relief, but has a limited amount of screen time.Dan Cortese is very disappointing as Colt, the organic researcher and "good guy." His performance was stilted and uninspiring.However, this is not unique in this film that lacks originality and recycles old themes. The evil cooperation versus the little guy. The government drone versus the civilian. The testosterone toxic military type versus the rebel. The industry versus the environmentalist. The geneticists verses the organic farmers. ... The banal list continues culminating in the human versus species of the week theme that is reflected in the title.If you have a free moment with nothing to do and are bored out of your mind, consider this as a possible option.