Taintlight (2009)
The tale of Stella, a young girl who falls in love with an ancient, beautifully-behaired bloodsucker named Edgar. They struggle to stay together in the midst of vampire carnage, but a love triangle bubbles up when a Michael Jackson-loving werewolf named Jack comes forward professing his own love for Stella. Meanwhile, a rival group of "real" vampires led by the evil Razor McBleed are prowling.
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Reviews
Too much of everything
the audience applauded
Overrated and overhyped
The film creates a perfect balance between action and depth of basic needs, in the midst of an infertile atmosphere.
For those who desire to see a decent spoof of "Twilight" I would recommend "Vampires Suck." Taintlight, which I found funny at times, was mostly crude. The film starts out with a man dropping his pants in the woods and then dropping the f-bomb. The humor includes far too many period, fart, incest, and masturbation jokes. Meredith Host is the twenty something that played a high school student.I liked the dad, who wore a t-shirt which proclaims, "I hate actors" which was clearly making a statement about the original film. Edgar would tell Stella to "shut the f@#$ up" and then say, "I'll see you tomorrow." Yes, there is clearly a spoof of the original, but the abundance of crudeness detracted from the film.F-bomb, no nudity.
TAINTLIGHT is an open spoof of TWILIGHT by the one and only Chris Seaver, a filmmaker with no discernible talent behind or in front of the camera. Seaver is best known for his shot-on-video horror/exploitation fare such as the FILTHY MCNASTY series but this sees him attempting a proper spoof of a popular film.Sadly, it's as infantile and ridiculous as the rest of the director's oeuvre, featuring nothing more than a bunch of non-actors getting into costume and hanging out in the woods. The humour is puerile, the over the top performances are supposed to be funny but really aren't, and the whole thing is nothing more than an appeal to the lowest common denominator.
This is actually a very interesting short film (video) although at times it seems to go out of it's way to be funny.PROS: It is a spoof of a series I am not a huge fan of which in it's own right makes it funny. The over dramatic as well as the occasional under dramatic acting give this an almost comical edge that most spoofs seem to either overdo or fail at performing. The opening shot of the guy trying to find a place to poop was somehow hilarious to me as well as the very last scene of the film. I did actually laugh genuinely throughout this short.CONS: The cinematography was rather bad, editing should have been better, the short seemed a little rushed at times and a couple of the supporting cast were a little too bland.Overall this short film is pretty good and quite interesting. It is good to watch as long as you do not try and take it seriously and aren't a huge fan of the overdone and overrated series this little short film (video) makes fun of.
If you are looking for a Mel Brooks quality spoof, just keep looking. This is not for you. This movie is filled with toilet humor, bad jokes, and terrible acting. That being said, it does accomplish it objective of spoofing even more terrible source material and I think some of the bad acting is actually a spoof of the cast of Twilight. I found it to be enjoyable if you are capable of overlooking the low budget limitations. It looks like a bunch of buddies shot it on their mom's camcorder, but there were some good laughs in there. If you don't have the patience for unpolished independent films, I would suggest Vampire's Suck instead. I would still much rather watch Taintlight a thousand more times than watch another Twilight movie.