Slasher House (2012)

Such a frustrating disappointment

Simply Perfect

Simply A Masterpiece

An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

A naked chick, Red (Eleanor James), wakes up in a locked cell with no recollection of how she got there or who she is. When her cell door is electronically unlocked, she finds post-it notes instructing her what to do. She is not at all perturbed by the fact that everything is green with just an occasional splash of red. She puts on a dress, finds a weapon inside a fridge, and wanders around a bit until she discovers someone else locked in a cell: a young man called Nathan (Adam Dillon). Everything is still green and red.While Red is trying to free Nathan, a homicidal clown called Cleaver (Andrew M. Greenwood) makes an appearance and the pair are forced to defend themselves. Cleaver is just the first of several psychos to be released over a period of time. Why are they there, who is controlling the 'game', and who will make it out alive? These questions and more will be answered by the end of the film, although why everything is green and red remains a mystery.With such a generic title, I wasn't expecting much from Slasher House other than a whole lot of gore; sadly, it didn't even deliver much of that. What we do get is a badly written, poorly acted mess that only displays a modicum of innovation in it's closing moments, when it builds a mythos around the central character that proves rather intriguing. The remainder of the film is dull and derivative, the film's opening being little bit Cube and a little bit Saw, but with none of either film's scares or tension, while the stark colour scheme is straight out of an Argento film, but rather than being used sparingly and with consideration, the effect is clumsily splashed over virtually every scene and soon becomes extremely irritating (while ruining what gore there is).And call me pedantic, but I also have a problem with the scene where one of the killers is pushed into an electric chair and fried with the throw of a switch: in a real electrocution, the whole chair isn't carrying the current—the process requires the application of moist electrodes to the head (via a metal skullcap) and the leg.

This is a pretty wild ride of a scare flick.For one thing,Why isn't Eleanor James in more or bigger flicks…Look up the titles : Backslasher,Bordello Death Tales,Was that her in CAM GIRL? ! Four serial killers and a babe: Well-We have CLEAVER the clown,CORBEN(Richard?),NATHAN(goblin) and THORN-The doom bringer ? CLEAVER,Like the others has a back story and it reeks in crimson and CORBEN reminds me of THE LACKEY,But bloodier and NATHAN has a GOBLIN/TROLL 2 alter ego that is amazing to watch take him over for the kills and THORN ….we found out is a franchise character who has a prequel in his future or something similar.The set is wonderful and obviously was Used at one time,make-up and effects RAWKED and the sound bothered me—Kept adjusting and then a kill will scare us and sound went down,Back and forth with the remote.

I watched this flick only for one reason, Eleanor James. Seen her in a few flicks somehow I liked her performances. And here in Slasher House she's doing the best she can give. But acting doesn't make a movie, the script has to be good too and I must say that this was a strange flick. Can't say it's really a horror although it do has 4 killers but nothing is really explained. I can understand that a lot of geeks will turn this off because the way it was shot do gave it a cartoonish look. The red and green (Argento anyone) are the main colors here. It's only at the end that it has it natural colors. And even I had my doubts to turn it off sometimes but I didn't because it's so weird. Just watch the opening sequence were Eleanor is butt naked and still nothing is revealed. Her naughty bits are always covered by something, a balloon for example. She do walks around naked for 5 or more minutes. From then on the movie starts going but the first 20 minutes are the most boring ones with a lot of talking. But after a while the first killers do enter. And they are not normal looking guys, it's here that the cartoon characters do come in. Just look at the end, the Russia part. The problem that I had with this flick was with the sound, the conversations weren't always good to hear. But the score used did remind you of the old slashers. Strange flick, weird story.Gore 1/5 Nudity 0,5/5 Effects 2/5 Story 2,5/5 Comedy 0/5

After watching this movie I was going to give it 3/10 but I read around the net and learned that the movie was made with a budget of like 5000 (ukrains?) bucks. Interesting.So, keeping that in mind I should mention few things..==== Pros ==== Despite the low budget, I must say that they did a impressive job with the whole look of the characters and the set. I suspect that the green tint also helps in hiding a lot of "cheapness" by giving it a stylish look.Acting is.. average. The protagonist is certainly beautiful and can act (but not very good at it..) and she does emotions quite well. The criminals she was trapped with, they did the job well (except for one guy who starts operating.. he was just comically bad).Good intros for the criminals as they are released from their cells, one of them (the most dangerous of them all) was definitely well done.Good music. Not great but was good enough, though too loud during dialogs for some reason.==== Cons ==== Acting overall was just bad. But I guess for the budget it was pretty good. Honestly, it didn't bother me that much.The "cuts" introducing the characters are good but oddly placed.Storyline, especially after the twist, turned stupid really fast.I still find it hard to take the protagonist seriously. Most of her kills seem accidental or so "girly" that the enemies just shake it off and keep moving.. until the script tells them to die.I am guessing that her inspiration came from Uma's Bride from Kill Bill, but yeah, not very convincing.=============In the end. I didn't hate the movie, but didn't really like it as well. It is a good movie if you have nothing else to watch. It's watchable and entertaining here and there. Also, 5000 budget is impressive. Movie was shot well for that budget (and like I said, set pieces and characters are well done).