The Thirst (2007)

This story has more twists and turns than a second-rate soap opera.

A story that's too fascinating to pass by...

This is one of the best movies I’ve seen in a very long time. You have to go and see this on the big screen.

The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.

I have to admit that I watched The Thirst because I sort of stumbled up to it, and really like Jeremy Sisto. I think he's a great actor and highly charming. I love him when he gets all psycho, preferably in a realistic subtle but very dark way. Of course there is nothing realistic about vampires, but that doesn't really matter as a good vampire movie drags you in and makes you believe. Unfortunately, this movie just didn't do it for me. Fair enough, the over-the-top sprays of blood were amusing and quite well done. The whole idea of a girl with cancer who's only way to 'survive' is to become a bloodsucking creature of the night, OK, I can deal with that too, as long as it is well worked out. But that is just the problem, the storyline was just too flat and much more could have been done with it. Then the dilemma of being a vampire but not wanting to kill, I have seen that all before but in a much better way. One of the finest American examples of such a movie is 'Interview with the Vampire', which goes far deeper into the suffering of the protagonist. Overall, The Thirst had some fun moments but not enough to make me fall for it. Honestly, after about an hour I felt so bored that I even thought about just turning it off. For some people though it might be a good way to spend their evening, but not me. I consider it to be nothing more then a teenage film that bathes in blood. The acting was quite flat, the characters all far too shallow and at times really annoying, and even Jeremy Sisto couldn't lift it up. It's a pity to see such a charming actor in a far too shallow role.My advice: If you are a teenager and like some over-the-top blood sprays and sexy bodies, and you want a popcorn night on the couch with some friends, then it might be the right movie for you. But if you like a real good vampire movie which goes much more in depth, watch for example 'Interview with the Vampire', 'Bakjwi' or 'Marebito'. The last one is one of the most intriguing vampire movies I have ever seen. And if you just want a lot of mindless fun with loads of blood, but all in a good and really attractive way, then 'From Dusk till Dawn' will definitely pleasure you a lot more then The Thirst.Sorry to displease the fans, but I just can't give this one more then a 3,5 out of 10.

This movie is what we got after a group of marginally talented people sat around and decided that what the world needed more than anything else was a cheap, dumb and low brow knock off of the cult classic vampire flick "Near Dark". The Thirst is trash. But at least it appears to understand what it is and doesn't skimp on any of its trashy appeal.Max and Lisa (Matt Keeslar and Claire Kramer) are two ex-junkies who fall in with a coven of dirty and degenerate vampires. Max takes to his new craving for blood like an addict falling off the wagon. Lisa, even though she's the one who rips out Max's throat to make him a bloodsucker and has no problem having a plasma-drenched threesome with the "mommy" and "daddy" of her vampire family, is fighting the urge to kill to satisfy her thirst. Max and Lisa try to kick the blood habit cold turkey and suffer through withdrawal, but eventually remember they have to stop their fellow vampires from slaughtering a bunch of kids at bible camp. That leads to a bunch of poorly staged fight scenes and the script forgetting what the term "undead" really means.This isn't a good film. The best things you can say about it are that it puts a number of naked bosoms on display and has enough spurting blood to fill up an Olympic-sized swimming pool. Beyond that…Matt Keeslar as Max give a performance like a manic-depressive infomercial host. Jeremy Sisto as head vampire Darius turns his role into an acting exercise, where he sees how many different accents he can use in the course of the film. I supposed Claire Kramer as Lisa is okay, but the rest of the cast is either flat as a board or chews up enough scenery to give themselves very serious intestinal blockages.Director Jeremy Kasten demonstrates the sort of directing skill you can only find on your local public access channel. The nicest thing I can say about his work is that I hope he was going for a "so bad, it's good" vibe for most of the film. That's what I hope. What I believe is that he just sucks.The soundtrack of The Thirst is aggressively horrible, particularly the first half hour of the movie where it seems like every 6 minutes a different yet equally awful song rises up during some poorly conceived montage. By the time it got to an insulting imitation of a Rob Zombie song, I had to fight the urge to turn off the DVD and scour out my ears with steel wool.This script is so stupidly melodramatic and emotionally nonsensical that the combined IQ of the 5 people who wrote it couldn't be higher than 86. It just blindly cribs from other gory vampire films without any effort to bring even one new or interesting notion to the mix.If all you want is boobs and blood, there's enough of both in this movie to leave you vaguely satisfied. You should really want more out of film than that, though.

Maxx (Matt Keeslar) is in love with Lisa (Clare Kramer) but she dies of cancer. To cheer him up some friends bring him to a place called Club Inferno (seriously). There he sees Lisa as one of the dancers! In short time he finds out she's a vampire...and belongs to a "family" who want him too.You've seen all these plots in hundreds of other vampire movies and this adds absolutely nothing new to it. This is also one of those direct to DVD "horror" films that has tons of graphic gore and pointless female nudity. The gore is so over the top it gets boring and I DON'T need to see nude females running around covered with blood. The dialogue is bad (and predictable) and the direction looks like it was done by somebody with severe ADD. Good acting by Jeremy Sisto (going WAY over the top) and Kramer can't save this. Keeslar is handsome and muscular but a total blank as the lead. This gets a 5 for some not too bad gore and the frequent shots of Keeslar shirtless, but you've seen this all before.

The Thirst starts as exotic dancer Lisa (Clare Kramer) is taken to hospital after falling ill on stage, she has terminal cancer but hasn't told her boyfriend Maxx (Matt Keesler) although it's not long before he finds out & is slightly annoyed that she didn't tell him. Maxx is depressed, Lisa is depressed & things just aren't looking great. As a potential solution Lisa decides to commit suicide because, you know, that would cheer everyone up wouldn't it? Maxx is understandably upset, he & a couple of his buddies decide to pay a visit to an S&M club called Inferono where he thinks he sees Lisa. Going back the next night he manages to catch up with her & it is indeed Lisa, unfortunately she's now a bloodsucking Vampire who hangs around with other bloodsucking Vampires who kill people. Lisa manages to convince the head Vampire guy Darius (Jeremy Sisto) to spare Maxx & let him become one of them which he does, however being a bloodsucking Vampire isn't as fun as it sounds...Co-written & directed by Jeremy Kasten this Vampire flick has a fair amount of blood & gore but little else by which to recommend it. The script by Kasten, Ben Lustig, Liz Maccie, Wayne Mahon & Mark A. Altman (it took five people to write this?!?!) is more or less a Near Dark (1987) rip-off although while Near Dark had great character's, acting & writing The Thirst clearly & most definitely doesn't. The plot feels pretty bad & unoriginal, it's not any fun to watch apart from some over-the-top gore scenes & it neither interested me or drew me in to the action. The character's are poor as is the dialogue & there's nothing here we haven't seen dozens of times before. It moves along at a nice enough pace & isn't overly boring but there was just something about it, something dull which meant I just couldn't get into the story or action. I certainly didn't think it was anything special & I think by the end of the week I'd have completely forgotten about it.Director Kasten does alright but I thought the film lacked energy or any sort of atmosphere & it certainly isn't scary. There are pleasing amounts of gore & the filmmakers use old fashion prosthetic make-up effects rather than CGI computer effects but most of it is pretty much the same with huge sprays of blood coming from people's wounds, there's some guts here as well, someone gets a finger in the side of their head, there are shots of the remains of cats that have been torn to pieces, someone gets a lamp shoved down their throat & several people get their throats ripped out but the blood looks a bit watery & once you have seen one huge spray of arterial blood you've frankly seen them all. There is also a fair amount of nudity & naked female breasts if that sort of thing interests you although none of the actresses are anything special in the looks department.With a supposed budget of about $2,000,000 The Thirst had a bigger budget than I was expecting & personally I'd have liked to have seen a bit more on screen action for that sort of cash. The acting isn't anything to write home about & the cast aren't that good looking either.The Thirst is a below average Vampire horror flick, it's OK on a basic level but there's nothing memorable here beside some gory Vampire bite wounds. Worth a watch if your a Vampire junkie or die hard horror fan otherwise there's nothing much here of any worth.