The Helpers (2013)

Simply A Masterpiece

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

It’s not bad or unwatchable but despite the amplitude of the spectacle, the end result is underwhelming.

Although I seem to have had higher expectations than I thought, the movie is super entertaining.

The film opens with a story about 23 orphans being killed in a fire. The rest of film is us figuring out what this had to do with the rest of the film with flashbacks to "10,000 Maniacs" and "House of a 1,000 Corpses." Seven young adults taken a back road into Vegas, a too common horror film set up, and find themselves stranded at a friendly bar and motel. Then the clever killings start, 1 person at a time in a slow methodical manner. I give them a plus for that.Dallas Lovato played the role perfected by Sherie Moon Zombie. She did a fair job, but they didn't let her go. There were a few good characters, but the rest, especially Claire (Kristen Quintrall) were mostly cardboard. The on screen horror chemistry and mood wasn't there. When Claire was attempting to hide, her continuous whimpering was more annoying than anything. Kill her, let's move on I kept thinking to myself.Once the film did tie together to that orphan thing..."Really? That's it?"They also had trouble with the title. The first title (used in UK) was "The Helpers" which actually related to the film, even though it lacks any horror factor. The US title, "No Vacancy" is a better horror title (We don't get a picture of little fuzzy chipmunks trying to help people) but it doesn't relate to the film other than the fact it has a motel in it, which BTW always had a vacancy. With "Motel Hell" already taken, the pickings are slim.Some attempt at dark humor like "House of a !,000 Corpses." If you need a slasher film fix, you could do worse.Parental Guide: F-bomb, sex, nudity (Rachel Sterling- Juggy dancer on "The Man Show")

This film starts off pretty basic and then gets ridiculous as most movies of this genre do. I am a fan of movies of this genre if they can do it correctly. The reason I say correctly, is that the victims need to be smart and the antagonists need to be that much smarter to pull something like this off. It starts off alright but then it goes to your basic protagonists acting stupid and you not caring about them at all. A few times I was actually cheering for them to be killed. The acting and effects were fine for a low budget film such as this, but the writing was terrible. They really couldn't do much to make this unique, but they could have made it more watchable.

I thoroughly enjoyed the 'Saw' series (give or take an entry or two), because their plotting, acting and inventive 'traps' lifted them well above the norm. Their main saving grace however was the solid vein of black humour, something which accorded them a standing with the similarly fun 'Dr Phibes' movies of the early 1970s. There was a conspicuously low budget with 'The Helpers', but so there was with the first 'Saw', and the creators made a virtue of it. A low budget isn't the problem here, and neither for the most part is the acting. What utterly destroyed my enjoyment of 'The Helpers' is a distinct lack of ideas. This means that the movie falls squarely into the category of 'torture porn', and simulated snuff movies are just a tedious one-by-one blood-bath which follow a depressingly well-trodden path to the inevitable 'it's not really over' ending and the raucous music accompanying the final credits. Thank goodness it was so short.

This movie left me laughing throughout. So many stupid things happen. The 'victims' are stupid; the killers are stupid.How can 78 people give this movie a 10/10? Unbelievable.I gave it 4/10 because I was being charitable.What's it about? Well not much. Seven 'teenagers' (who are all in their late 20s/early 30s) go on a road trip. The usual thing happens. Their car tyres get a puncture and yes you've guessed it they go off wandering for help.THIS, the movie tells us, will be their downfall.After walking a little while, they meet up at a roadside motel and gas station. All seems friendly at first but then the inevitable happens. Nothing is surprising. Nothing is that much interesting. You know they're not going to leave that place singing and dancing.The victims act dumb because they are dumb. You'll find yourself screaming 'kill him!' And guess what happens after knocking one of the killers unconscious, YEAH, THEY DON'T KILL HIM.Hmm, looks familiar. But now it's boring.If you're looking for something different in this movie, forget it. It's like Saw and Vacancy rolled into one, except the majority of the acting sucks big time.Ultimately it's very forgettable.