Groom Lake (2002)

Save your money for something good and enjoyable

Crappy film

This is one of the few movies I've ever seen where the whole audience broke into spontaneous, loud applause a third of the way in.

An old-fashioned movie made with new-fashioned finesse.

First, I must say, this film is pure comedy to me. I first saw this a long time ago flipping channels, and there was Shatner so I stayed on the channel. I couldn't stop laughing. Everything about it was beer out the nose hilarity. I was so enthralled by the nonsense terribleness I couldn't believe anybody could have made this movie even The Shat. I figure it was like this, while gazing out across the ocean from his cliff top estate sipping a fine brandy Shatner pondering a new song he wrote on a napkin:"A guy and girl go on some find meaning to life trip. They meet aliens that make her feel good about life, you know, in general."The writer took this "story" and was like alright let's find some room to add in a random alien watcher rape scene, a random jeep tumbles down the hill scene where obviously since they've just survived a terrifying roll down a ditch they must dry hump even though it's like just after the rape thing. Oh and remember to have "chase scenes" all the time and "men in black". And because the note mentioned aliens the writer was like Area 51 we all know that's where aliens are.But it really does kick off with Area 51 itself... they don't have HUMMVs on base, (I mean you know they are researching aliens, so they are concerned with gas prices) NO! they have golf carts. And you can just gain entrance with a set of surplus fatigues and a black armband. And then they follow somebody in the security door.Just thinking about it makes me laugh and consider pulling it off the shelf for a watch. OH YES! I searched it out and purchased the DVD, because I felt the need to enrich my friends and coworkers lives with this movie. They usually feel betrayed and confused after seeing it, but I can only blame that on government mind control.

Speaking to the craziness of this film, I think it is also important to note that a SEMI drives over some old, rattle-trap car. Both occupants somehow miraculously not only survive, they are thrown from the vehicle (on foot no less) and run after the semi.Yea, a couple surviving a roll-over like that, falling out, and getting it on in the dirt and dust is a little off-base, but the semi scene. Really, Shatner? This was so painful to watch.I hope this was meant to be a spoof, but I have this lurking suspicion that it's not.

I love Bill Shatner. I have seen most anything he's done, and even went to Ssplat attack II to see him. Still, he shouldn't just take any damn movie. I mean, there is that stupid chef show, now this, this horrible, horrible movie. You may think 'how bad can it be?'. Well, I was dehydrated for two days from spitting on the DVD and cursing Bill Shatner's name.

William Shatner has been around the movie and tv business long enough that he ought to be able to do simple things like choose film stock, know when something looks cheesy, and know when acting is bad.In Groom Lake, Shatner simply did not consider quality. One scene looks like a movie set and another looks like someone's bedroom, shot with a home 16mm film camera. Maybe he did put some love into the film, but that is not what moviegoers come to watch.This is a horrible movie. Don't rent it unless you absolutely have to see how low Shatner can go. If you do rent it, be prepared to scratch your head in confusion, and groan with pain over the this turkey.