Mortuary Academy (1988)

Best movie of this year hands down!

the audience applauded

Sorry, this movie sucks

Although I seem to have had higher expectations than I thought, the movie is super entertaining.

Whenever I think about Paul Bartel and Mary Woronov I remember Eating Raoul. That was a rather strange black comedy, not the greatest comedy in the world by any means, but at least well written and well acted. So when I found Mortuary Academy with Paul and Mary (and Tracy Walter, another of my favorites), I thought, well, it sounds pretty stupid, but it can't be that bad, right? Wrong!!! This is one of the worst pieces of absolute garbage I've ever seen. Most of the actors have no talent. The script is a disaster. Worst of all, it's not even remotely funny. The jokes (so-called) are on the level of very ignorant grade-school boys. If you gathered up a bunch of third-grade morons and told them to make a comedy, this is probably what you'd get. At some point I just gave up and stopped watching.

It's one thing to try and rip off "Police Academy", but it's another thing to put a spin on your rip off that concerns a very delicate subject - death, corpses, and the mortuary business. Oh, it's possible to generate laughs with those subjects, but it takes a lot of careful thought and execution, which is entirely missing from "Mortuary Academy". What will strike most viewers is how drained of energy most of the movie is, generating instead a sombre and grim feeling that doesn't exactly induce laughter. It doesn't help that the whole package feels unfinished - there are a number of confusing moments that suggest linking footage was never filmed for one reason or another. The movie has a somewhat interesting cast, but all the participating actors seem as weary and dejected as the movie's atmosphere, so even they can't milk any humor out of the material. It's no surprise then that the movie apparently spent several years on the shelf after being completed before being dumped on video and instantly forgotten.

Meek and suicidal nerd Max Grimm (a likable Christopher Atkins) and his more smooth and assured brother Sam (an equally amiable Perry Lang) are forced to take a course at their family's mortuary academy in order to inherit two million dollars. Kinky closet necrophiliac and head administrator Paul Truscott (Paul Bartel in fine droll form) and his sexually frustrated assistant Mary Purcell (a terrifically brash portrayal by the ever-delightful Mary Woronov) are determined to flunk the siblings so they can take over the place. Director Michael Schroeder, working from a pleasantly twisted and silly script by Bartel and Bill Kelman, relates the cheerfully inane story at a steady pace and maintains an engaging tongue-in-cheek tone throughout. The game cast have a ball with the wacky material: Atkins and Lang are charming in the lead roles, it's always a treat to see Bartel and Woronov in anything, plus there are sound contributions from Tracey Walter as eccentric electronics wizard Don Dickson, Anthony James as twitchy and scary ex-con Abbott Smith, Lynn Danielson as the sweet Valerie Levitt, and Stoney Jackson as hip aspiring rap singer James Danridge. Popping up in cool cameos are Wolfman Jack as crafty rock band manager Bernie Berkowitz, Cesar Romero as a cruise ship captain, Richard Kennedy as a lawyer, and "Playboy" Playmates Dona Speir, Rebekka Armstrong, Kymberly Paige, and Laurie Ann Carr as nurses. This film's main praiseworthy achievement is how it manages to treat the questionable subject matter in a surprisingly playful and good-natured manner; even the potentially tasteless subplot involving Trescott's infatuation with the fetching corpse of a deceased teenage cheerleader avoids being too gross or offensive and hence provides some of the picture's biggest laughs. A very funny and enjoyable flick.

Brothers Sam and Max inherit a mortuary from their late uncle with the added stipulation that they must pass the Mortuary Academy which is run by Paul and Mary (Paul Bartel and Mary Woronov from "Eating Raoul"). who don't want the brothers owning the mortuary and do everything in their power to stop them. This movie has numerous actors that fans will remember (Pual Bartel, Mary Woronov, Tracey Walter, Wolfman Jack, and Vance Colvig Jr) All those name faces from B-movie greats can't mask that this film stinks more then a year old corpse. Bad taste CAN be funny. IF done right, pretty much every subject can bring about a laugh or three, but that requires talent, something this movie seems to be lacking. Furthermore, to mention this film in the same sentence as the classic "Porky's" or "Revenge of the Nerds" is damn near blasphemy.My Grade: D- Eye Candy: Cheryl Starbuck is topless