Warlords (1989)

One of my all time favorites.

Best movie ever!

It was OK. I don't see why everyone loves it so much. It wasn't very smart or deep or well-directed.

All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

The star of this film " Warlords " is suppose to be David Carradine, (Kung-Fu) but I wonder if he regrets it? I have not seen a movie this bad since 'Blair Witch.' The film is directed by Fred Ray who claims to know his craft. Not so. Not after this poor offering. The premise is of a post apocalyptic world where Dow, the hero (Carradine) wonders the land in search of his long lost wife. With him as a companion of sorts is a mutant head in a box which talks, constantly complains and makes snide remarks. Joining Dow is Danny (Dawn Wildsmith) a renegade woman who is constantly firing her guns and rifles, but can't seem to hit anything. Sid Haig plays 'The Warlord' who with his menagerie of bare-breasted women, is as menacing as a loose tooth. The warlord plans on recruiting a mutant army with the help of Ross Hagen as Beaumont, Fox Harris as the double crossing Colonel Cox and Robert Quarry as Dr. Mathers a veterinarian. You might consider watching this film if you are totally bored out of your mind, which is what will happen to your head if you finish it. To say this film is bad is an understatement. The question remains, why did a fine actor like David Carradine do this film? It has got to be the worse movie of his career. *

Surely someone like David Carradine would be smart enough to getting involved in this low budget rubbish. This movie is the pits, low budget, daft story-line, a puppet mutant and a rip off Mad Max two. It has a interesting side story, of an army officer who comes a likely Allie of the Heroes in this movie. For someone who is a high ranking army officer, he seems to be a imbecile who couldn't even run a ant farm, let along an army. Interesting at the start, it shows him coming out of what appears to be a white van, than a underground bunker. Why is he alone, wouldn't there been other soldiers with him. Later he shows up, appearing to have live in a desert for years, yet his uniform is in good shape, like it been iron the night before, and chances it was, its not even dirty or ragged for someone who sleeping in the desert for years.There is many boobs, even with the opening scenes of two babes been chase by bandits over the desert, when they catch them, rip off their tops, revealing their boobs. There is another sense, with the warlord, were it appears one of the bandits is push into the front of the camera by one of the film crew.I only watch half the movie, when the puppet shows up, i had enough of this and switch it off in disgust, well i really fast forward to see if there was anything Elsa worth worthing. There wasn't.Don't watch this movie, watching an ant crawling up the wall would be far better waste of time, than watching this brain dead, low budget, crap feast.

Yeah, it's dreadful. If you see it in a video store, there will usually be some empty space on either side - the nearby movies have subtly scootched themselves over, for fear this movie is contagious.My favorite bit was the "mutants" who have become dependent on radium in the atmosphere. Therefore, they have to wear gas masks with _radium in them_ in order to breathe. The fact that this allows the hero to kill the same three guys over and over again is purely coincidental, I'm sure. I can just imagine the director talking to these guys: "OK, after you get shot, we'll pan away for a second. Run around the tent and attack again. Then go the other way. It'll be great"It's also rather amusing to note that, while civilization seems to have completely collapsed, silicone breast implant technology seems to have survived intact. Either that, or it's an effect of the radiation.

I sure hope the actors working in Fred Olen Ray's films are having fun when they're making them. Because we, the viewer, sometimes have no fun at all.Enter WARLORDS. Some sort of MAD MAX-inspired cheese that has really little point(except for blowing up a few cars, and displaying some of the cheapest effects since GHOULIES), WARLORDS is insulting to everyone's intelligence. Anyone who finds this entertaining should go back to the hospital, 'cause you've gotta be sick to like this.Dawn Wildsmith, once married to Fred Olen Ray, is the damsel in distress, Sid Haig is the bad guy, there is bad chase music, a mutant sidekick, and caves. What Fred Olen Ray movie would be complete without some cave footage(perhaps he is homaging EEGAH?)WARLORDS is probably no worse than all the other films that Fred Olen Ray directed that year, but this is hardly bragging rights. When the measuring stick is this short, what's the point in playing at all?