Bail Out (1990)

So much average

If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

Good , But It Is Overrated By Some

There's no way I can possibly love it entirely but I just think its ridiculously bad, but enjoyable at the same time.

***SPOILERS*** Direct to video, and it shows, action flick with the at the time, in having two hit TV shows "Baywatch" & "Night Rider", very popular David Haselhoff as bounty hunter and part time tennis instructor White Bread Donaldson or just W.B for short. W.B together with his two bounty hunter friends Mason Blue Walcott,Tony Brubaker, and Casper "The Bean" Garcia, Thomas Rosales Jr, is given the task to make sure by their cheapskate boss Aran Haronian, who's played by an actor who had his name taken off the films credits, that heiress Nettie Ridgeway, Linda Blair, makes her court appearance or else's he's out one million dollars in the bail money that he put up for her.As we soon find out Nattie was at the wrong place at the wrong time when she and her boyfriend, who unknown to her worked for the Colombian drug cartel, were busted by the police. The 5 million in coke & heroin that her boyfriend had on him was also taken from him before the bust by a rival Iranian drug gang who set, in him being busted, the whole thing up! With Nattie being kidnapped by the Colombians lead by their boss Caesar Zalazar,Greg Scott Commin, it's now up to W.B & Co. to get her back and not only save her life but her pop's Mr. Ridgway's,John Vernon, home and bank account! That he's putting up to Zalazar & Co. as collateral for the 5 million in missing coke & heroin!The movie limps along at a snails pace with both David Hesselhoff and the by now at age 29 fully developed, from her pre and later teenage "The Excorist" & "Roller Buggie" days, Linda Blair trying to make it worth watching. About the only thing that makes the film work is a number of car and helicopter chases and series of explosions that besides keeping your interested in this turkey also keeps you awake. Both Brubaker & Rosales Jr, as fellow bounty hunters Walcott & Garcia, are in the film more for comedy relief then anything else! The by far biggest disappointment in the film is that we never get to see the sexy Linda Blair disrobe even once. Which was about the only thing left that could have possibly save this as boring as watching paint dry turkey of an action movie from being the total disaster that it turned out to be.

Bail Out is a silly action/adventure/comedy which isn't very funny, at least not intentionally. The original title "W.B., Blue and the Bean" (which appears after the end credits, while "Bail Out" is the title in the opening credits. Did they forget to change it?) should give some indication of the movie's intentions.Roger "White Bread" Donaldson (or W.B. for short) (The Hoff) is a part-time tennis instructor and part-time bounty hunter. He has two associates - you guessed it - Mason "Blue" Walcott (Tony Brubaker) and, of course, The Bean (Tom Rosales). When heiress Nettie Ridgeway (Blair) is abducted by drug lords (led by Cummins of Action U.S.A. (1989) fame as Zaldizar) and spirited away to Mexico, it's up to our three heroes to save the day. They have to get her to court on time in order to collect a million dollars. The three buddies want to open their own bail bondsmanship so they can stop working for the haranguing Aram Haronian, their boss. Will they succeed? While it is funny to see the mighty Hasselhoff with his mullet and giant cell phone hamming it up for all the world to see, and an attempt is made at politically-incorrect humor ("these guys drive worse than the Orientals!", "Roasted Colombians, nothing' finer!", etc.) sadly it all seems a bit forced and unfunny. Once they get to Mexico, there is a stereotype Mexican character that is very, very annoying. The movie was already on pretty thin ice by then, and the addition of this character did not help at all.There are some car chases, shootouts and horseback riding, and the cast is full of familiar faces such as Trejo, Flower, the Hoff, Blair, and a surprising appearance by Gregory Scott Cummins as the drug lord. We were so used to seeing him as the all-American good guy from Action U.S.A. He truly has a lot of versatility. John Vernon is also on hand as Linda Blair's father. What is he truly up to? Nothing really weird or truly noteworthy happens in Bail Out. It's all pretty standard fare, so stupid at times it almost insults the audience's intelligence. We know it's a direct to video movie starring The Hoff, but come on. Give us some credit here. But then again it was directed by Max Kleven, the "mastermind" behind Fugitive Champion (1997). At least Chip Mayer was nowhere in sight. So if you can survive all the groaners for jokes and some middling action, you MAY be entertained by Bail Out if you are in the right mood (i.e., a really goofy mood).Bail Out was released on VHS in the U.S. on the great Vestron label. We couldn't find any commercially-released version of the film under the "W.B. Blue and the Bean" moniker. If you have a picture of that, please send it in.For more insanity, please visit: comeuppancereviews.com

It was my friend's birthday and he LOVES cheesy bad cinema - the kind that are sooo incompetent and unintentionally hilarious - so when I saw a DVD copy of Hasselhoff and Linda Blair in a flick called BAIL OUT for 2 bucks - bingo - I bought it and gave it to my pal. Well, we laughed our butts off - this movie starts bad and just keeps getting bad. You see badly executed stunts, awful acting, garish costumes and stunningly corny dialouge "There's a time for shooting and a time for talking" - Hasselhoff was also a producer on this and he makes sure he gets well lit and his hair is always perfect and hair sprayed into place - he plays a bounty hunter called Whitebread who is also a tennis pro - there are clichéd Asian gardeners, clichéd Mexicans, clichéd Arabs, clichéd evil Columbian drug lords - there is even a scene in Mexico where a Mexican character living way out in the middle of nowhere is wearing an actual mariachi costume and they never call attention to it! Like - hey we all dress like this, see? Wow - you have to see this to believe it and most of the time Linda Blair is tied to a chair and gagged so she does lots of special EYE acting. This is one of the greatest bad movies ever made. Hasselhoff rules - you have to pay attention when he almost slips trying to jump onto a truck or his special thrusting of fists in the air as he celebrates shooting down a helicopter (where you can plainly see the wires attached to bring it down). A very special piece of rotten cinema.

Apparently when David Hasselhoff read the script and saw his on screen partners would be a Hispanic character and a token afro American he thought "my god i can feel the on-screen chemistry already!" - HE WAS WRONG! DEAD WRONG! When you see this film you really just want to say "gee Dave music really is the best career for you!" this film is unbelievably confusing, for starters its never explained why Hasselhoffs character is called Whitebread! AWESOME!!! The film is described as an action comedy which it is in a way, Hasselhoff wandering around trying to save some bint from drug lords whilst waving a pistol around like its a sock is some of the best unintentional comedy ever! The only explanation for Linda Blair agreeing to do this movie is that the priest didn't do a good enough job! as she must have been temporarily possessed by the demons of straight to the 99p bin in asda, ironically i bought this movie for 2p less in tesco, i could have spent it on something far more entertaining like a bath mat! all in all you should see this film if only to see Hasselhoffs awesome guns!