Breast Men (1997)

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

The joyful confection is coated in a sparkly gloss, bright enough to gleam from the darkest, most cynical corners.

All of these films share one commonality, that being a kind of emotional center that humanizes a cast of monsters.

This is one of the best movies I’ve seen in a very long time. You have to go and see this on the big screen.

With a title like "Breast Men", one would expect at least some entertainment value, a little bit of cheesy humor, something that would live up to the promise of the title. Well, friends, this movie fails to deliver on almost every level. How, you may wonder, can this be? This movie makes medical history, breasts, and the 60s, 70s, and 80s boring--no small feat.First off--yes, there are breasts. Lots of them. Large, small, droopy, and perky. Some of the talking head bits (well really talking breasts, since we see no heads), somewhat like those in the vastly superior "Kinsey", are mildly amusing. The two brightest elements in the film are Lisa Marie--as the model for the breast implant--and Emily Proctor, injecting a good deal of charm into what is a generally charmless firm.The film follows the careers of Drs. Saunders (David Schwimmer) and Larson (Chris Cooper), the inventors of the breast implant. (Supposedly, the film is based on the actual inventors. Let us hope that their lives were somewhat more interesting.) We start with the stereotypes of the gruff older doctor (Cooper) and the young inventive hotshot (Schwimmer) and sink rapidly from there. Chris Cooper is a far better actor than one would guess from performance--all he is here is a bundle of crabbiness. David Schwimmer is far worse--does this man have any talent besides a hangdog look? Here, he goes from young and hangdog to sleazy and hangdog to sleazier and hangdog--it is a merciful relief (spoiler) when his Corvette gets mashed at the end of the film. He maintains one basic expression--constipated. (It would be interesting to match him with Kristin Scott Thomas, who also looks perpetually blocked...wait, that is just too dreadful to contemplate.) Oh yes, the music isn't bad, and the costumer designer and art director had some fun with some truly hideous 70s styles. But the visual delights are not enough. If you could roast this turkey, it would be completely lacking in taste and texture. (I give it a two only for the music and the art direction.) As Charlie Brown would say--bleahhh.

Breast Men i think is a good movie. I give this 10 out of 10. This is totally for 18 year olds only. This was made in 1997, this movie shows women showing their breasts. This happens in allsorts of adult movies. It is very rude.

Trust trailers to always be made in such a way that it makes a movie much more interesting and exciting than it really is. Although Schwimmer can act, in this case, he probably doesn't suit the role. The only sense I can see in casting him in his role as one of the doctors is that he looks the part of the nerdy/geeky doctor who thinks breast-implants are good by being a voyeur, who later becomes so full of himself he becomes his own nightmare.Although this is billed as docu-drama, it feels more like a fictional reality-based show. The trailers make it seem as though as if the film would be filled with women with small breasts who finally make it better with fuller ones, but in the show, the breasts that are shown (faceless), whether pre- or post-op, are sometimes scary-looking, and mostly very turn-offish. Of course, I don't mean that you should watch this show for the bare breasts, but at least try not to scare off the viewers. Or at least give them some warning in the trailers or at the beginning of the movie.

I usually hate made-for-TV biopics -- arguably the sloppiest, most formulaic, and most boring genre of film. This witty picture about the inventors of the silicone breast implant is an exception: it sticks to the formula, but it always keeps its tongue in its cheek. Filled with visual jokes and inspired casting (Lyle Lovett as a chemist!), it's about as good as this kind of picture can be -- which is a lot better than I thought.