Tiptoes (2004)

Very best movie i ever watch

Sorry, this movie sucks

Absolutely Fantastic

Exactly the movie you think it is, but not the movie you want it to be.

1. Most men will adamantly turn down a hot chick's offer for a blow job. Am I right, guys? Am I? Hello?2. You know you are marrying THE ONE when she's comfortable enough to admit she'd love to see you as a kid circle jerking it with other young little people.3. If your fiancée reminds you she's pregnant, and while staring directly at her stomach, you state: "Yes. You are," immediately start planning on at least 18 years of child support.4. "The asshole is the strongest muscle in the human body," or so Lucy tells us. I always thought it was the tongue. Oh, well, when those two meet, maybe they can duke it out.5. "And in a role of a lifetime…Gary Oldman," says the trailer. Well, they got that half right.6. Do most women will put their pee-soaked pregnancy test on their coffee mug they're still drinking from, or is that some kind of circle of life thing?7. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito look more like real-life Twins now.8. You're only really homeless until you remember you own a million-dollar cabin in the woods.9. Really, the only thing anyone can do when their cell battery's about to die is toss it as far as possible into the dark woods.10. Where was the episode where Dr. House visited the Little People Hospital?11. Real people have bodies like Matthew McConaughey and are given names like "Steven." Fake little people settle for "Rolfe" and carry on the rest of their lives on their knees.12. Every proper Motel Employee Training Manual should include: Check out time can equate checking out of life.13. If the Quasimodo look doesn't add sympathy, Gary, try wearing a real person's robe.14. Unprotected sex is okay, as long as you're asleep. Yes, this includes rape.15. David Alan Grier went onto many great projects thanks to Tiptoes. Such as: Bewitched and Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil.16. Becoming Jewish is easy! All you need to do is change the subject of insulting little people and laugh your faith and Christ off.17. LPride conventions are a ton of fun, when you're not on the run.18. Maybe being kicked off a bus in the middle of nowhere did Lucy more harm than good when she considers a roach motel a high end Hollywood resort.19. I didn't know how to spot ADR that well, until I heard most of the lines from the "French" Peter Dinklage.20. Little people might want acceptance from ALL! Well, except from the homosexuals they rally against.21. Patricia Arquette's wardrobe and hair choices were made by a blind person. See? They tried to include everyone here.22. When Kate Beckinsale calls you, remember it's gonna cost you. $3.99 a minute sounds about right.23. People can take food from others and it's not considered stealing. Food's from God, it's plentiful and God wants us to eat it. Huh. Well, I will tell that to the cop next time I dine and dash.24. Granted, I am not a parent, but do all babies look like blocks of wood?25. Big black men want little white women. Or so I'm shown. Or so the party goers are shown.26. "No! I need George Lucas. He's the only one who can do my hair!" is how I imagined Kate Beckinsale got her hair styles just right for the movie.27. Never give your loved ones heads up there are little people involved.28. Not many people know there's a lot of "good money in (the) firefighting business."29. You can go from calling little people "midgets" and worrying drastically your child will become one to choosing an actual little person as your lover in mere weeks.30. I'm not a CGI fan, but using a couch instead of CGI to hide normal size legs is just…hilarious.31. "No faggot doctors!" is shouted by a character we are supposed to feel sorry for.32. "What is the motivation of my character?" asks McConaughey, who's both supportive of his midget family as well as ashamed of them, who wears a retainer but won't fight with it in, who trains firefighters but yells when his personal life gets in the way, who has to be away on business for a week but is only minutes away from home, who wants to make his fiancée jealous of him by bringing his hot, blonde student and then ditches her the second the two meet, who doesn't want a child but will accept said child until it's a few weeks old. 'I think he's confused, just punch a hospital wall mere moments after your son is born and figure it out,' was probably the answer he got.33. Heck, just watch Daniel Tosh's Tiptoes Uncut video (look it up online.) It's worth a watch following the movie… tosh.comedycentral.com /video-clips/ u1lmo5/ spoiler-alert-- --tiptoes--uncut (Just Google that. I had to add spaces for IMDb rules.)

"Tiptoes" had so much potential but as other IMDb reviews will tell you it falls flat quickly. The plot sounds interesting and Gary Oldman never disappoints, though his role is bizarre in this one. The plot quickly loses footing and doesn't know where it stands.Matthew McCoanughey and his Kate Beckinsale play a couple who find that they'll be having a baby together, only to Matt's chagrin the baby could possibly be born a dwarf just as family. Gary Oldman plays his brother, who accidentally breaks the news. One of the Arquettes plays a weird supporting character that doesn't seem to have any relevance to the story. Peter Dinklage plays Oldman's friend.Gary Oldman playing a dwarf...what's to be said? His "prosthetics" seem to be simply folding his legs back into his jeans, and nothing is used to hide that fact. McConaughey and Beckinsale do a well enough job, and Peter Dinklage is the only somewhat interesting person in the film. The Arquette is pretty pointless after a while.It's one of those "I get where they're going, but..." movies. Very hit-or-miss, and for me it was a miss.

Huge disappointment. Great cast, and it started out really promising, but by the end it was total Movie of the Week. Not sure what they were thinking - the movie seemed nicely offbeat during the first half but then it got bogged down in melodrama. I learned a lot about dwarfism of course, which seems like it was the point, but I didn't enjoy the movie and that's a shame. Kate Beckinsale is a terrific actress who can move effortlessly among genres, but she is ultimately wasted here in a part that a much less talented woman could have played. It was fun to see so many well-known Little People, and they were all excellent, but not enough to save the movie. Too bad, because this could have been something special.

Gary Oldman is a brilliant actor sure, but whoever cast him as a dwarf amongst other real life dwarfs should have their head examined. If you're making a movie about dwarfism (such as is the case here), for God's sake cast a REAL dwarf in the title role! Anything less is just an insult to little people and anybody who watches this sad excuse for a film.In addition, the script and characters frequently come off very contrived, the direction and pacing are sloppy at best, and the melodrama and lack of chemistry do not help this train wreck make it to the station.