Cool Dog (2011)

Thanks for the memories!

From my favorite movies..

I really wanted to like this movie. I feel terribly cynical trashing it, and that's why I'm giving it a middling 5. Actually, I'm giving it a 5 because there were some superb performances.

I wanted to like it more than I actually did... But much of the humor totally escaped me and I walked out only mildly impressed.

This film is probably the worst piece of cinema ever to walk among the earth freely, or at all. The acting is atrocious and is less than laughable, the jokes were woeful and the story in general was ridiculous, however there were also many small plot holes I feel need to be addressed. To begin, a whole lot of things the stupid dog in this film does, examples include, winking, turning off alarms, driving, playing checkers, wearing headphones (not over his hears), using a TV remote, shielding his eyes from the TV, and sitting at the dinner table with the family. To name a few. Also, somehow this little girl in the beginning of the film manages to fall OVER a rail, onto a bridge plank, HOW!? How is she that stupid? Also, the film managed to hit the climax in the first 20 minutes, where they played a sad song over a boy loosing his dog. WHY!? Why would anyone do this? This would mean that the rest of the film is just a dog finding his owner, which it is. Also, in terms of story, many small holes I feel need to be addressed, including, the opening sequence, where Rainy (the dog) walks down the street and everyone seems to know who he is, this in itself is stupid, as for some reason every person in the town seems to know the dog. Why? Why do so many people care about this one German Sheppard and like it so much? Also, some horrible direction I noticed during the film, including when the family tells Jimmy they are moving to NYC (which was filmed in Louisiana and looks nothing like NYC) and the child is sad for about ten seconds, then moves on to not caring immediately, I mean, this is hard to believe on the audience's part, I feel like the film's director could have just told the child to just pretend to be a little upset for the rest of the scene at least. Also, in the same scene, when the child is told he can't bring the dog to NYC, it is the most expected bad news I have seen from any actor. One more take would have been a good idea on that one. Also, a major hole in the story is that the entire film, the step mother, and Jimmy's father said that they are looking for a place that allows pets in New York, so why can't Jimmy just deal without the stupid dog for a couple of weeks? Also, the fact that there was no real character introduction, they basically jumped directly into the film's story, making it so that no one actually cares about the characters anyway, therefore making the film extremely difficult for any viewer to care about at all. Finally the last thing I need to point out, is a major mistake from the editor and director in the opening credits, the credits read "A David Lerner movie" WHY!? Would a professional call his own FILM a movie, credit sequences are supposed to use proper language not "movie", that is simply a massive no-no in the eyes of directors, yet he let it happen anyway. To conclude, Cool Dog is probably the worst thing to exist in my opinion, as it is ridiculously far fetched contains awful jokes about stupid things, was directed awfully, and contains so many story holes with some of the worst acting I have ever seen, and may hold the title for worst acting ever. It is astonishing how this film ever got released at all.

Although B movie actor Michael Paré is in this movie, and a bigger name than anyone else in the cast, his name is not printed on the front cover of the DVD box along with the three cast members names that are printed on the front cover. I strongly suspect Paré saw the finished product before its release, and was so horrified that he demanded that his involvement with the movie be minimized. Which I can understand, because even for a kids film, "Cool Dog" is a real dog. Some previous user comments have already mentioned the bad and broad acting, so I won't get into that. What I will say is how predictable and ridiculous the movie is. The various plot turns you will have seen in countless movies before. And the title dog's intelligence is so high that it's ludicrous - this dog can (among other things) play checkers, play the harmonica, and even drive a car! There's plenty of attempts at humor (mostly slapstick), but they are so broad and lame that I think even kids will find it more dumb than funny. I will end this review with some advice for the filmmakers: Louisiana is not a convincing substitute for New York City!

The acting is awful, the plot is predictable. And excuse me, but when did Louisiana get mountains? The ONLY so called mountain in Louisiana is actually a summit called Driskill Mountain that is in reality a tall hill. Then there is the small fact that NO ONE even sounded like they were from Louisiana! I tried to figure out just what Parish of Louisiana they were trying to portray but as none of the main characters sounded southern and there was that mountain in the background it was impossible. The only person that even tried to sound southern was Kent Jude Bernard and he just had a very small part. Even my grandchildren got bored with this movie! Now maybe, and I mean just maybe, this movie would be good if you were having a bout of insomnia and needed something to put you to sleep. Most likely though it would just annoy you to the point of not being able to sleep so forget that idea! Just don't even bother with it is my advise.

My 12 year old daughter and I had a great time watching this movie together, not because it was a great movie, but because the acting was horrible! The "special effects" of the dog crying was one of our favorite parts of the movie. Another part that was really funny was when the boy's dad slides down the pole. Quality entertainment!Christna Cambell the "actress" who plays the mean stepmother was the worst and as a result the funniest part of the movie. The boys father is the second worst actor although it was a close call.I cannot believe these people were actually hired to act! I recommend watching it just for the purpose of laughing at its ridiculous acting!