Tales of Halloween (2015)

Simply A Masterpiece

One of my all time favorites.

Absolutely Brilliant!

a film so unique, intoxicating and bizarre that it not only demands another viewing, but is also forgivable as a satirical comedy where the jokes eventually take the back seat.

Tales of Halloween is low budget and it is very aware of that which just gives the film charm. This film consists of 10 fast paced horror stories that are all messed up and weird in their own way. The first story had me thinking "What the heck?" for one hour straight, but I would rather not spoil it and leave it to you to watch. This film is filled with gore and blood gushes everywhere throughout each story. Every single story in this film is well written and kept me on the edge of my seat throughout the entire 1 hr 30 minutes this film lasts. The music in the movie was actually really good and a pleasant surprise and the visuals while being mediocre are expected for such a low budget film and considering that I won't be too harsh on this flick. This film is also very similar to the Tales From The Crypt series which really made me want to watch the film in the first place because I personally adore that series. The stories were all short paced and kept the movie going at a constant pace never leaving a single dull moment. This is a MUST WATCH for horror fans.

This is my first time reviewing a movie on this site. I disliked this film so much, I feel the need to warn others to stay away. As a disclaimer: I am a fan of classic horror films, as well as more modern horror films and bad b-movie type of movies. There is nothing charming about this set of short films. They are not scary, they are not funny. They are not creative or even very interesting. Despite there being 10 short films to watch, only a handful of times did I find myself actually engaged with the characters and story lines. Here is a run down of events as best I can remember them (keeping in mind I watched this movie just 3 hours ago.) Sweet Tooth - Two uninteresting teens tell a slasher ghost story to a little boy. The story (for the first time ever, apparently, despite this story being a "rite of passage" and town legend) comes true. Characters make bad choices, and the viewer is left more confused than entertained. The Night Billy Raised Hell - A neighbor plays a prank of Halloween night. This segment was meant to be funny, but all of the sound effects and horny devils came across as more cringe inducing and bizarre than actually hilarious. Also there is a strange and inexplicable cameo from America's Next Top Model Adrien Curry.Trick - Seemingly chill adults are terrorized on Halloween Night. This one left me yelling at my television set as adults try to hide in very small corners and fall drunkenly into pools. I feel this would have been better done if the attackers were the main characters. Again, I was left more confused overall because even though I could see what the director was trying to say, it wasn't done effectively. The Weak and The Wicked - Western styled. Arsonists. Cool costume design. One of the more engaging films of the series, but still eye-roll inducing. Grim Grinning Ghost - After hearing a ghost story, a woman is afraid to travel home alone at night. I appreciated this one. Things were set up nicely, and almost every set up had a pay off. Solid premise, if more classic story telling. Ding Dong - This one was ... interesting. A woman wants to have a baby. Oh boy, does she REALLY want to have a baby. The husband grapples with his wife's desires. Ovens are involved. And silly blonde wigs. The overall premise was enjoyable and I liked the costume work and creepy imagery. Unfortunately again, this one was a muddled attempt that ultimately felt under-done. Maybe if given more time overall (and less screen time devoted to flashes of red face paint) it could have been stronger. This Means War - I liked this one. Simple premise, reliable narrative, engaging ending. Friday The 31st - This segment made me and my watching partner very, very angry. While the other short films had so far been mostly boring, confusing or underwhelming, this one was so stupid it made my blood boil. No logic here. Just cheap callbacks to beloved horror movies like The Evil Dead, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, etc. poorly done and thrown together for kicks. This was a joke between friends that was taken too far and allowed onto the screen. The Ransom Of Rusty Rex - Plot twists and kidnappings. Enjoyable, amusing, somewhat gross. One of the better segments, well acted compared to other bits. Bad Seed - Ugh. Spare me! By this point I was just waiting for the movie to be over. I'd come too far to really stop now. The effects were cool, and the premise was a strong one, but I was emotionally drained and stupefied by and hour and a half of horrible Halloween "fun".I would highly suggest saving your money and your sanity and choosing to watch literally ANY other film this Halloween. Seriously. Anything else.

Don't read any of the reviews that are positive about this movie because they obviously participated in this movie or are related to somebody that participated. It's absolute garbage. A horror movie is supposed to be scary, or at least try to be scary. This one is none of the above. Not only there are ten different stories in Tales of Halloween but none of the ten is even slightly good. They are all crap, one by one boring as hell. Now, if you have kids between eight and ten and you wan't them to shut up for 90 minutes on Halloween then just put them in front of this garbage. In any other case avoid this monstrosity at all cost. What a waste of my time. I rarely give movies the lowest rating possible but in this case it's justified.

Terrible horror anthology...well, horror comedy anthology, I guess, since there's a lot of attempts at being funny in this. Almost all of the stories here fall flat. The best of the lot being the second story, "The Night Billy Raised Hell," with Barry Bostwick as a devil (or THE devil, I don't know which) who teaches a boy how to do proper pranks on Halloween. It's got a few good chuckles in it but it's nothing particularly special. The rest of the stories are borderline unwatchable. Others have compared this to kiddie things like R.L. Stine stories and I guess I can see that. I'm not sure if that was intentional on the part of the directors involved, most of whom have more straightforward horror creds in their resume. Anyway, perhaps there is a market for this and I'm just not in it. I thought it was really bad, both as horror and comedy.