The Scorpion King 3: Battle for Redemption (2012)

A Major Disappointment

I cannot think of one single thing that I would change about this film. The acting is incomparable, the directing deft, and the writing poignantly brilliant.

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

After playing with our expectations, this turns out to be a very different sort of film.

Mathayus (Victor Webster), the Scorpion King, has lost his sorceress-queen and his kingdom. He returns to live out the rest of his life as a mercenary. He is hired by King Horus (Ron Perlman) to stop his brother Talus (Billy Zane) from stealing the Book of the Dead and taking over the throne. He is paired up with Germania warrior Olaf. They travel to the Far East kingdom ruled by Horus' ally Ramusan who guards the book. Tallus has kidnapped Ramusan's daughter Silda. The kingdom is facing a revolt by the mysterious Cobra. With no gold in reserve, Ramusan offers her hand in marriage in exchange for her rescue. Mathayus discovers hidden secrets and conflicting schemes while looking for a medallion.The writing is a mess. The acting is generally bad. The production is a mixture of bad and wow, they have elephants! The action is chaotic but at least, there is lots of it. There are plenty of extras. And did I mention the elephants? This is strictly B-movie time here. Even the action gets tiresome after awhile.

Awful. Completely awful. I applaud those of you who managed to watch this entire piece of crap, but I could not. I was only 12 minutes in when I found myself IMDb'ing the movie and reading the other negative reviews. And then proceeded to watch the next 20 minutes of the movie in 30x speed whilst I thought up how to convey my disgust into words in my own review.Mummy I & Mummy II were great. Mummy III was alright. The 1st Scorpion King was even alright. But don't be fooled...this has nothing to do with those movies, other than a brief reference at the start.I honestly feel sick knowing that they spent approx. 5 million bucks on this sad excuse for a movie, just for people to rag on it. Imagine all the time and effort spent by all the cast and crew, and have everyone hate it. lol...I keep falling for it...they get your interest by displaying a somewhat known actor on the cover (Ron Perlman & Billy Zane), but the lead actor is some no-name who can't act. Even Ron and Billy, when they're on screen, are at their worst. Obviously in need of money... Well now they will have even less because what was left of their already diminishing careers is now completely destroyed.This is one of those movies that is just so bad...and you want to form your disgust into words, but you just cant...there are no words for this. It's horrible. Don't watch it. And I know when people say don't watch something, it just makes you want to watch it more. But trust me, the reviews are right on this one. It's bad. Really bad. Just....don't...Every time I looked up from reading the other negative reviews, the character's were in some other part of the world. When I first tuned out the two main character's were fighting, and the so called 'king' was getting his ass kicked. Then I read another review, then looked up again and they were in some full-blown war with about 100 people - that escalated quickly!From what I could tell at 30x speed, the story-line made no sense, the acting was atrocious, the visual effects were just bad, and the cinematography left something to be desired too...Go home Scorpion King 3. No one wants you.

I guess the director thought he could compensate the bad script and the bad directing with cheesy jokes. Unfortunately he couldn't. With little effort, this could have been an OK movie. The idea is not bad. The acting is not fantastic but I assume they did what they were told to do. So the failure boils down to the director. Let me explain why this movie is rated this low. It is boring (I mean it. Even the fight scenes are boring. You see two people fighting and the rest of the crowd in the battle field do silly movements), there are so many cheesy jokes and they are not funny at all, the sound tracks are not appropriate for this genre, acting is cheesy as well and the directing is ultra bad. Overall, not worth watching.

This is a great movie if you want a good laugh. I cannot even say what the movie was about since there is no plot- just endless bad one liners and ridiculous fight scenes between roman soldiers an ninjas and barbarians and ghost warriors and elephants and some chick whose clothes reveal more skin as the movie drags on. I love conan movies and other mindless movies like that, but this was so painfully stupid i wished i could hold my breath and pass out. At times i don't think the actors even know who they are supposed to be fighting. I paid one buck for this movie at redbox and feel totally ripped off...where do the chariot races fit in??? Was this movie really under 2 hours???? It felt like 50 hours...