Alien Predators (1987)

Don't Believe the Hype

Yo, there's no way for me to review this film without saying, take your *insert ethnicity + "ass" here* to see this film,like now. You have to see it in order to know what you're really messing with.

It really made me laugh, but for some moments I was tearing up because I could relate so much.

This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.

The plot: Three friends encounter a malevolent alien after driving in an RV and a field of cattle die from some sort of bloody infection.I must say, the cow corpses are pretty nasty for those who do not like to see raw meat. And the blood and gore in this film in general is pretty decent, definitely something worth checking out if you are into that.I think the one guy does a great Rod Serling impression, and later they run into a Talky Tina doll. Someone clearly loved "Twilight Zone"...The Indian family was very weird, not unlike the guy from "Short Circuit". I am amused by how non-Indian the daughter looks compared to her parents.

This is a tricky case. "Alien Predator" is a pretty terrible movie, but its redeeming points are there. You just need to now how to look for them. What it's about is three young people heading through Spain in a RV on vacation. They come across a town called Duarte and discover that the nearly deserted village is populated by some strange people who get nosebleeds a lot. What's going on is that, five years before, there was a space station that had been doing some nice, little experiments ("The results on the test animals were horrendous!") and, somehow, all that loveliness came crashing down into a Spanish desert just outside of Duarte. The microbes that cause the mess laid dormant for the following five years, and took effect just in time to catch our three protagonists at the time of their arrival. Now, they have to figure out how they're going to save the world from microbes that are already airborne and cause everybody who comes into close contact with them to go nuts within 48 hours of original contact before exploding in a gory mess as an alien creature emerges from their bodies. They get some help from a scientist who was involved, and, boy, does that help go a long way! Why do I say this? Watch this until the end and judge for yourself. Yes, I have to give a spoiler alert: SPOILER ALERT! They don't save the world. The end! Now, what did the filmmakers do wrong? Let's really think about this. Despite how cheezy the movie is, it generates some fairly well-executed moments of tension and suspense. Also, the gooey, gory effects are done pretty well, and the creature effects are kept pretty brief (showing that these people knew that they were dealing with a low budget). After all, if they would've shown the creature too much longer, it probably would have looked too damn fake. Another thing is that most of the cast holds up pretty well, and, furthermore, there are some great moments of humor. Everything else was practically done wrong, and not in a laughable way. Even with redeeming points, this is one of those movies that's just so bad it's bad. The ending I don't mind so much. Sure, the acting was generally good, but the actors were working with what they had been given, and what they had been given was not a whole hell of a lot. I must say that the characters aren't really people that you'd be wanting to save the world, seeing as how, in their spare time, they are competing for sex, even after the trouble has long begun. I think the main reason that I don't have a problem with the ending is this: Why should the world be saved? If you ask me, the end of the world would be a relief!

Campy fun, especially the three leads, two young guys and a girl, goofing off on their vacation in Europe. They're both hot for her (she played Bibi Dahl in For Your Eyes Only, and James Bond considered her cute enough for ice cream but not for boffing) but they're just friends. One who likes to do impressions, the other keeps flirting with her, and she's a little air-headed but all fun to be around.Everyone else takes their characters *so* seriously that it's funny, so tape it on Sci Fi (I'm not sure if it's on video) and watch it for a fun movie that you can MiST/riff along with the leads.

I've seen a lot of bad movies, but this ranks near the bottom of them all. Sometimes obscure low budget movies can be quite entertaining, such as "Time Walker" and "Star Crash", but this film is just plain boring. The alien in the title has about 45 seconds of screen time total, and when it finally does show itself it isn't even very threatening. The rest of the film is slow and poorly acted, and sometimes just doesn't make much sense. Even the guys at MST3K would be hard pressed to make this one interesting. Avoid at all costs.