Helen Keller vs. Nightwolves (2015)

Such a frustrating disappointment

Don't listen to the Hype. It's awful

When a movie has you begging for it to end not even half way through it's pure crap. We've all seen this movie and this characters millions of times, nothing new in it. Don't waste your time.

Exactly the movie you think it is, but not the movie you want it to be.

This is the third in the series of a Masterpiece Theater spoof hosted by St. James St. James (pronounced Saint James Street James). In this story he corrects history by giving us the real story of Helen Keller, made blind and deaf by nightwolves, which she learned to fight blind and deaf.The film is designed to be campy and spoofs modern society and film making, but not as good as they could do it. The jokes got old and the bits were expected. The anachronism shamelessly abounded as part of the humor, but when flooded by them, it loses its appeal. Helen Keller jokes were very funny when I was nine, as an adult, they are simply old...besides they missed the best ones and messed up others.Guide: F-bomb. No sex or nudity.

I felt embarrassed while watching this deeply juvenile and completely offensive B-movie, which takes the story of the real-life deaf/blind Helen Keller and mixes it with werewolves in a way similar to ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER. This is a film that mercilessly lampoons the disabled; the depiction of the bumbling, idiotic Keller character is stupid beyond belief, and the poor production values means that the action rarely leaves a single set. The humour is forced and unfunny, and how they got 'proper' actors like Barry Bostwick and Lin Shaye to appear, I have no idea.

Not only did the director capture the true essence of who Helen Keller really was, it seems like he LIVED it. Did I direct it? Maybe. But ask yourself this... didn't WE all direct it? Once you see these Nightwolves up close in stock footage you'll feel as if you were really there throughout every single last page ever taught to us in a history book. I for one LOVED it. NAY, I NEEDED this film. Anyone who says they didn't like this film probably needs to get their bicycle seats adjusted by a professional at a bike shop. Not just some hobbyist out in a garage. I'm talking about a real bicycle shop in a metropolitan area.

This was the most exquisite, fantastic movie of my entire life. I have never seen such a well directed, supremely acted piece of work. The visual effects were absolutely stellar. I was titillated the entire way through. The dark humor was tactful and elegant, while the action was raw and coarse. It is not only entertaining, but exceptionally educational. The real story of Hellen Keller is honestly something that should be taught in schools across the globe. It is a story that needs to be told.Unfortunately, my viewing partner acquired cancer half-way through the movie, so I was forced to halt my experience. I would definitely recommend to all ages, sexes, genders, and those with disabilities.