Murder at the Presidio (2005)

Too much of everything

Instant Favorite.

Excellent, smart action film.

This is a must-see and one of the best documentaries - and films - of this year.

I had to go back to the beginning of the movie to view the stock footage again to make sure this movie wasn't about the Presidio of Monterrey. It turns out that not only was the story really about the Presidio of San Francisco, but that also it 'missed it' in at least three main areas, in a made-for-TV production. As noted elsewhere, the comparison to realistic military living is off. I could only wonder with a dropped-jaw how a single Military Police corporal had such extravagant living quarters, and consider with rolled-eyes how the military post was inaccurately depicted as having a guarded entry gate. Further, none of the sets were created to accurately show the real beauty of the post, it's landscape makeup, or how the buildings were really constructed. Sure they showed enlisted family housing very near the water, but it is a beach and not near the yacht harbor. Finally, interesting talent was cast for the telling of the story, but beyond that the film direction demonstrated a lack-luster effort at best. After viewing it, the movie left me feeling disappointed, betrayed, and even a little upset about the loss of time spent viewing it. So frankly, as also noted in another place here, this crime story really about a place that is not at the Presidio.

This movie should be watched by anyone who wishes to learn from bad examples. God, it was a struggle to watch this. When the end came, it was a mercy, like the end to a long bout of cancer. This is a murder alright, but the script is the victim.Let's get into the problems. As a Canadian, I could spot this piece of trash as from Canada right away. I was standing in line at the bank once, a long while ago and this guy in line behind me starts talking about the government grants he was receiving to make a film. "Doesn't matter what trash we make, so long as it's Canadian." As a taxpayer, it gives me a nice warm fuzzy feeling.This script was not reviewed by seasoned professionals. It's got too many clichés in it that are obvious. For example - the cop with mental problems. This cliché is done so badly, we only find much later why he suffers from guilt that drives him to drink. When we do, it's hard to imagine all that self-destructing behaviour coming from such a complicated set of circumstances. I'm self-destructive because my mother baked a vanilla cake on a Wednesday and I like chocolate on Thursdays. The cause and effect are so disjointed in time we wonder, "Why are they telling us this?" The conflict cliché. The Captain of the MPs claims jurisdiction in a murder case. I was half expecting the newspaper boy to rush in and claim jurisdiction. "I delivered newspapers on this base for years buddy, so that corpse is my responsibility. Back off!" The love interest cliché. The woman MP quickly jumps into the sack with a stranger she just met. Now I ask you, is that love? Why not insert a porno movie at this point for two minutes and then go to commercial. It would make as much sense.Overacting: Okay, lots of it here, from the MP Captain to the mother-in-law, it's hot and heavy coming from the lesser roles, playing for the cheap seats. If you want to be noticed, why not be noticed for doing a good job instead of hamming up the role. It's level jumping, and it's not permitted.Miscasting: Jason Priestley is cast in a very minor role here wearing his Perry Como smoking jacket. Sound the trumpets, a star has arrived. I kept expecting something to happen. He must be in this for a reason. Nope. Hoping for more, like a hanging participle, it simply was an incorrectly cast.Also, while we're on the subject, that danged Texas sheriff warnt from nowhars near the Lone Star boy. To my ear, he hails from somewhar up in Wisconsin. Might as well have cast a London Bobby in this role.Factual Errors: Hire a goddamn technical consultant, you cheap pigs. Soldiers shave, they wear the correct cap badges and don't call non-coms "Sir". If you can't afford one, watch another film where they do! I'm surprised you didn't have World War Two Shermans driving around in the background. People watch LAW AND ORDER for 20 years because it's technically well written. Lawyers write for the show. Take a page from their notebook. At least do some fact checking.Crap Cinematography. Filmed using 70's vintage video instead of film , obviously not quality digital when witnessing the colour bleeds, faded backgrounds and motion blur. The director was doing the "you-are-there" jiggle cam for the first 10 or 20 minutes of the film and gave up on it. You can't do Jiggle Cam with cheap video. The executives probably had to have their eyes checked after watching the daily rushes. Lot of HDTV's probably get returned to the store after watching this.Believability. Nothing kills a story molecule quicker and deader than the .44 Magnum Bullshitter. It's a huge cannon of a gun that shoots blobs of diarrhea onto the pages of the script. The smell can repel you for several pages of story and take your mind away from what's happening on the current page. The sheriff in Texas picked up the phone and called San Francisco based on a badly drawn composite. "Yeah, we've got your guy. I was picking my ass looking for something to do and I noticed the striking similarity between one of our rape suspects and your stick-man drawing here and I thought, what the hell, let's call up the Presidio for a laugh." Also, don't sheriffs in Texas talk with a drawl. Why not cast Tevia from fiddler on the roof. Ah, but I repeat myself.And finally, I'm bringing this critique to a close not because I have run out of things to say, but because I'm tired. If you feel exhausted too, then you know what this film has in store for you. Lou, you hitched a ride on a wild turkey here, son. At least that part of it was entertaining.

Item 1. I am a former Infantry Officer and was astonished at the number of military mistakes I saw. It detracted from the movie, which in my opinion was weak and showed little imagination,e.g. Lou Phillips was a CID Warrant Officer, but is called "Sir" and / or "Lieutenant" a number of times. W.O's are referred to as "Mr." or "Chief" without exception. The MP Captain treats the CID W.O. with disrespect. Warrant Officers carry a lot of clout. Senior Warrants I knew personally would speak to general officers on a first name basis.Item 2. The MP Captain had a partial beard...That is a wrong answer. His Captain's Bars were on incorrectly and he had no branch insignia. His beret had a unit crest instead of his rank and in general, his demeanor was unbecoming of an officer.Item 3. I like Victoria Pratt a lot, but on the cover of the DVD she has the flash on her beret over her right eye instead of her left eye. And when she left the EM club, her blouse was unbuttoned and flopping. No MP would ever walk around like that, especially a female MP. They're working in a traditional man's role and all that I have met are sticklers for professionalism.Item 4. The Captain and his men abuse the CID WO and then the enlisted guys knock him down and kick him. That is crazy! Assaulting an officer is a Court Martial offense. Give me a break! Item 5. The Major has a Combat Infantryman's Badge, which is conceivable if he branch transferred from Infantry to the MP's but which only further stretched plausibility.Item 6. MP's discharging full automatic weapons and killing several people including civilians would have had the FBI all over the place. Why didn't that happen? This movie was a slap in the face of veterans in general, but especially disrespected Warrant Officers and the Military Police Branch in particular. Rating it as a 3 was a gift.

Lou Diamond Phillips sadly signed his name to this train wreck of a "movie". Phillips does his best to make lemonade from this lemon of a script, but it proves fruitless. The unknown supporting cast laughably overacts. The writing is awkward & the characters are unsympathetic.Phillips plays a military detective, and former MP, who comes to the Presidio (the former military base in San Francisco that was closed and converted into a national park in 1994, not to be confused with the Presidio in Monterrey, CA which houses the Defense Language Institute) to solve a murder. His love interest, a female MP who looks extremely awkward in her over-sized uniform, proves way too easy, so it is difficult to sympathize with them as individuals or as a couple.The plot boasts TV-ready predictability, and the production was obviously made for TV- there were even breaks in the movie to insert commercials! What a disappointment. My advice...skip "Murder at the Presidio" and watch a "Law & Order" rerun instead. The plot will undoubtedly be more interesting.