Caligula and Messalina (1981)

Good story, Not enough for a whole film

Boring, over-political, tech fuzed mess

The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.

The story, direction, characters, and writing/dialogue is akin to taking a tranquilizer shot to the neck, but everything else was so well done.

"Caligula and Messalina", obviously made to cash in on the dispiriting success of the notorious "Caligula", is not quite as bad as that movie, which is faint praise indeed. It is, however, almost painfully boring: proof, if any were required, that wall-to-wall sex and nudity can't prevent a movie from becoming soporific.The plot is, allegedly, about the Roman emperor Caligula, Messalina (the most notorious woman in Roman history), Agrippina (her rival), and the emperor Claudius. The movie has very little dialogue, and practically no exposition, so if you don't go in knowing a fair bit about these classical figures, you'll be left in the dark for much of the movie's run-time.Though, of course, "Caligula and Messalina" isn't a historical picture. It's an exploitation movie. So, there are a lot of ridiculous added details, such as Messalina first getting Caligula's attention by fighting in the colosseum. Women didn't fight in the colosseum anyway, but even if they had, I'm pretty sure a blood-relative of the current emperor would never have found her way there. The movie ignores the fact that Messalina was related to Caligula and just gives you this lame introduction for her character, which could have worked a bit better if it had been directed with some kind of skill.This is a motif throughout the whole film, in fact, and is part of the reason why it's so boring. Capable filmmakers shoot establishing shots of scenes that are framed so that we can see everything we need to see. The camera then provides close-ups of actors or action or significant details to make us feel involved in the action. "Caligula and Messalina" does the first part of this, and just seems to leave it at that. The camera is always too far away. If the director can't get us involved in the story, he could at least give us a good look at the sex and nudity the movie is chock full of, but alas, we don't get that either. The distance between the camera and the actors, and the generally poor camera angles, leaves most of the nudity hard to make out.I'm pretty sure that if you are unfortunate enough to watch this movie, there's only one thing about it you will remember, and that is the two scenes of horses mating. One was more than enough, but "Caligula and Messalina" inexplicably includes two such scenes. Was Bruno Mattei, the filmmaker, actually trying to cause harm to his audience by making us watch this?

Made to cash in on the notoriety of Tinto Brass's 1979 movie 'Caligula', Italian trashmeister Bruno Mattei's 'Caligula and Messalina' is packed to the gills with depravity. Despite lacking the hardcore action and graphic gore to be found in Brass's movie, Mattei's production (available on German DVD in an uncut 108 minute version) is still fairly entertaining stuff.John Turner stars as nutty Roman Emperor Caligula, who commits incest with his sisters, makes his horse a member of the Senate, and executes the innocent on a whim.Messalina (played by gorgeous Betty Roland) is a power-hungry nymphomaniac who will stop at nothing to become Empress of Rome. She brings herself to the attention of Caligula by battling in the gladiator arena and it is not long before she achieves her goal, upsetting the Emperor's youngest sister Agrippina, who hopes that her son Nero will eventually become ruler of Rome.Agrippina successfully plots Caligula's downfall, but Messalina rains on her parade by immediately jumping into the sack with his successor, Claudius. But naughty old Messalina can't commit herself to one man, and shags everyone in sight, including a grotesque, but well-endowed, frequenter of brothels, a randy midget, her eunuch(!?!?) and an ex-lover. When she ends up pregnant, and it is obvious that the father is not Claudius (since he has been away fighting in foreign lands), Agrippina finally sees her opportunity to be rid of her nemesis once and for all.Chock full of graphic sleaze (nudity, simulated sex, Bacchanalian orgies, rape and buggery), this movie is definitely not one for the easily offended. And if none of that bothers you, then the graphic scenes of horses and donkeys getting jiggy will probably do the trick. Surprisingly, in contrast, the violence is pretty low-key, with most of it happening off screen.Mattei, obviously working with a low budget, resorts to padding his movie with footage from other films, particularly for crowd scenes requiring many extras, but to be fair it all works pretty well. 'Caligula and Messalina' is fun slice of schlock entertainment and is worth a viewing for fans of historical exploitation, but those hoping for the polished look and excesses of its more famous predecessor may be disappointed.

If there was a possible scientific way i could travel to the past it would be in the roman times.This is because the life expectancy was trivial and usually 25-30.The women still had big bushes of hair on their vagina and men could walk around being rich doing what they wished watching gladiators fight and being a political snide bastard using words and power to corrupt and felicitate your enemy's while being able to get away with anything because of the lack of government control in the peoples way.I Love USA, But i want to live in 420 B.C ^_^Also i see this move about Caligula factually correct which means more to me then any of my dreams.

I just saw this movie, and I cannot believe how poor it was even for an exploitation film. I am not familiar with the accurate history of the real Caligula but it could not have been anything like in this movie. Of course, that's not necessary in an exploitation film but in this case it is just too stupid. Their seems to have been absolutely no research into the actual life in Rome at that time. Moreover, the sex scenes are really poor. Maybe with one or two erotic moments, and with one or two attractive females. The torture scenes are just terrible and depressing. At least a movie like "Hostel" portrays torture in a more interesting fashion - there is something about the early exploitation films that make you want to scream out in boredom at the stupid torture scenes. All things considered, this is a horrible movie which should never have been made. I feel the same about movies about torture in the Holocaust. Movies like that are simply dangerous to the mind, and a complete waste of time and life. It is difficult to prove that movies like that are actually damaging to the mind, and I don't mean it in any moral sense, but we all know that movies like that are absolute trash, and that we would be better off watching something interesting. I bought Caligula because I thought it might be good but it wasn't. I think, the Druuna comic book series is excellent. But this Caligula film doesn't deliver anything other than negative and stupid stuff.