Loosies (2012)

Just perfect...

Best movie ever!

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

The first must-see film of the year.

What an awful film, I seriously can't believe how many people seem to inexplicably have liked this as shown here by the amount of positive reviews. The script was poorly written, misogynistic, clichéd, horribly paced, and just all around boring. At some points I just had to laugh at the beyond ridiculous lines and their abhorrently acted deliverance. If this wasn't the last straw after "Twilight" that banished Peter Facinelli to guest staring on B-rated TV, I don't know what was. I'm also sad to see Jamie Alexander relegated to this trite and uninspired piece, she deserves so much better. I hope no one ever has to suffer such a nauseatingly low budget feel, with horrid music choices, an awful script, and sadly unrealistic ending that made me feel no resolution or satisfaction. If I could give this zero stars I would.

Bobby Corelli (Peter Facinelli) is a pick pocket in NYC. Lt. Nick Sullivan (Michael Madsen) has become the butt of the joke after Bobby stole his badge and started using it. Jax (Vincent Gallo) is his fence. He runs into Lucy Atwood (Jaimie Alexander) who tells him that she's pregnant after their one night stand 3 months ago.Peter Facinelli is great at being a weasel and he does a good job in Nurse Jackie. However he's not leading man material. He's good at being pathetic but he's not good at being a stand up guy. He comes off as whiny. The romance just doesn't work and his character is horrible. He's kind of cringe-worthy. It's scary to think about this character as a father.

I didn't know a thing about this movie other than its less-than-inspiring IMDb plot synopsis but I watched it anyway just because I had a sleepless night to kill. 88 minutes later I felt like I had just watched a modern classic.First of all, who would've guessed that prettyboy Peter Facinelli ("Twilight") could write such a clever story as well as act it to perfection? Here we have a crime-drama-romance that can be every bit as chilling as Scorcese's "Goodfellas" (1990), every bit as human as De Sica's "Bicycle Thieves" (1948), every bit as romantic as Reiner's "When Harry Met Sally" (1989) and with an ending as unexpected as "The Usual Suspects" (1995), all wrapped up in a superbly acted & directed hour and a half.The plot cannot be properly conveyed in less than 500 words so I won't bother trying. Let's just say it has to do with a small-time crook who gets in big-time trouble while simultaneously meeting his dream girl and royally screwing that up, too. But he's a good kid who loves his momma and is the most ethical crook since Robin Hood, so we can't help but love the guy. Unfortunately there are several psychos on his tail, and when I say psychos I mean psy-CHOs.I didn't realize beforehand that two of my favorite actors were in this film: Joe Pantoliano (whom I'll always remember as "Doc" from "Eddie & the Cruisers", but you may know him as "Ralph" on "The Sopranos") and the incomparable Vincent Gallo ("Buffalo 66"). For you Gallo fans, he reprises a classic line from Buffalo 66: "All girls are evil!" which got a unanimous LOL from the room. I was sorta by myself, but that's beside the point.Gallo actually plays one of the aforementioned psychos while the other psycho is played by a very disturbing Michael Madsen ("Reservoir Dogs"). They each play the type of character who could, at any minute, jab a pencil in someone's eye just because they don't like the way they look.Balance this against Peter Facinelli's boyscout charm and Jaimie Alexander's sweet, wholesome demeanor, and who could overlook the brilliantly cast Marianne Leone (Joanne on "The Sopranos") as momma, and you have yourself the full spectrum of characters, making this a very unpredictable and consequently a very tense film.I should add that it has a very cool soundtrack with music by bands I had never heard of, but I'll be looking them up. Particularly the film's theme song "Sing Out" by the Grand Magnolias.I usually end my reviews with a list of similar films, but "Loosies" is truly one-of-a-kind. Don't miss it, if you know what's good for you.

Brilliant Story, excellently written and executed. I like this genre anyway and feel that this film is up there with the best of its kind. I am a huge fan of Peter Facinelli and follow all his work, so I was naturally looking forward to seeing this film and I was not disappointed. The characters are all very believable, the story is original, and the ending was really satisfying. The acting was very good, helped by a great cast. I really enjoyed the relationship between Bobby (Peter Facinelli) and his Mum (Marianne Leone) it felt very natural and believable. The story between Bobby and Lucy (Jaimie Alexander) felt destined and I enjoyed the development of the relationship. I would highly recommend this film and look out for more of Peters work in the future. Already looking forward to watching it again.