The Christmas Train (2017)

The Worst Film Ever

Very interesting film. Was caught on the premise when seeing the trailer but unsure as to what the outcome would be for the showing. As it turns out, it was a very good film.

The best films of this genre always show a path and provide a takeaway for being a better person.

The acting in this movie is really good.

A lower tier Hall of Fame caliber movie, but Hall of Fame worthy none the less. The cast was strong and the main actors well known and respected. Dermot Mulroney and Kimberly Williams Paisley made an attractive and likable couple. I personally find Danny Glover incredibly annoying, but I love Joan Cusack and enjoyed her role in this movie. The setting on the train to California? I loved it, but I'm prejudiced. I was lucky enough as a teen to travel from Chicago to Los Angeles on the El Capitan and The City of Los Angeles and back again during the Christmas Season. The plot was OK and benefited from being based on a David Baldacci book. The twist at the end really saved the story, though. After reading another reviewers comparison to the book, I really am considering reading the book upon which this was based.Reviewing Hallmark Christmas movies are kind of a stupid hobby of mine, and I like to review the dreadful ones and the enjoyable ones or if I think I have something valuable to point out. I am jotting down a little review of this one because it's a cut above the usual.

Every Christmas, the Hallmark channel comes out with a fresh line-up of Christmas movies that play all day every day from Thanksgiving through New Year's Day. There's a sprinkling of really great ones mixed in among the mediocre ones that are tolerated because of the spirit of the season. And every once in a while, there's a movie so putrid you'll either turn it off or wish you had once it's over. Unfortunately for Hallmark, this year's all-star film that received the majority of the publicity and advertising is by far the worst corny Christmas movie I've ever seen. And I watch every Christmas movie I can get my hands on.The incredibly handsome Dermot Mulroney takes a train from Chicago to Los Angeles, and the moment he arrives at the station, his fellow passengers start acting incredibly weird. They're all introducing themselves, telling him their life stories and asking about his, and doling out clichés like Halloween candy. The lighting on the train is overexposed, adding to the already ominous aura; I actually considered turning the film off because I was convinced the train was full of dead people and they were escorting Dermot to Heaven—that's how not-normal the film felt.As incredibly handsome as Dermot Mulroney is—and trust me, you'll be tempted to keep watching the movie just to keep staring at him—his gorgeous mug isn't enough to even remotely save the movie. And as bad as I feel for him for being forced into taking this role, I feel worse for Danny Glover. He was in The Color Purple, and now he's been reduced to playing an eccentric film director in the worst Hallmark Christmas movie ever made? Shirley MacLaine starred in Hallmark's A Heavenly Christmas last year, so it isn't unheard of that big names flock to Hallmark during the holidays, but The Christmas Train is so awful it almost defies description.Every corny, tooth-aching cliché you can think of is included in the script, and there's even a few included that I'd never heard before—and I sincerely hope I'll never have to hear them again. Literally every single line of dialogue and plot point is terrible, from the first scene to the last images before the end credits. Even if you're desperately in love with Dermot Mulroney—and I can't imagine you loving him more than I do—do not watch this movie unless you want to start hating Christmas movies.

The Christmas Train was one of the best Hallmark Christmas movies this year. I loved all the actors, the heartwarming stories, the snow storm and the mystery thief. I gave it a 5 because of the "unmagical" ending.I had this magical feeling. Everyone was happy and Christmas miracles were everywhere. Then the shock that all the stories were planned by the editor on the train...the young couple getting married, the chance meeting of the journalists and the list goes on and on. All fake. That took the joy away from the entire movie and ruined it for me. The magic was gone after that. I asked my relatives what they thought and they all said the same thing. The ending should have finalized without the finding of the script and the planned outcome. The ending provided no Christmas miracles or joy. A calculated, unmagical ending does not fit the Christmas season.

This was the biggest dog of a Hallmark Hall of Fame movie premier I've ever seen. The dialogue was abominable - stilted and totally unconvincing. Danny Glover as Max whispered and rasped his lines (probably because he has an old voice). Joan Cusack's "acting" was comprised solely of screwing up her mouth in order to show a range of emotion: confusion, sadness, empathy, you name it. It was very unattractive and distracting. The plot was totally unbelievable, including a scene in Chicago where Tom and Eleanor go dancing (and swilling champagne) at a reception where everyone except them is in evening wear - they never would have made it through the front door! Ridiculous. I couldn't even suspend belief and enjoy this mess, although I watched til the bitter end. Don't blame me if you watch this movie and are sorely disappointed!