The Expendables 3 (2014)

Nice effects though.

Tells a fascinating and unsettling true story, and does so well, without pretending to have all the answers.

The joyful confection is coated in a sparkly gloss, bright enough to gleam from the darkest, most cynical corners.

Worth seeing just to witness how winsome it is.

Okay fine The Expendables franchise isn't a complete failure in my eyes, this is by far the best one and three movies in shows potential.First of all I want to address a point. I've long since complained about the state of a world where it's highest paid people are actors, singers and sports people. Though I'm a movie obsessive I'll never deny that they are offensively overpaid and Expendables 3 demonstrates that with the absence of Bruce Willis. They tried to get him back in a small capacity, just 4 days work and offered him 3 million. 3 million dollars for 4 days work! In response, he demanded 4 million and they decided to cut him loose. So think about this, a man being paid more for a days work than a minimum wage worker is likely to make in their entire life! That ladies and gentlemen is the world we live in.Anyway I digress.I wouldn't go as far as to say that The Expendables 3 entertained me but it certainly had its moments. The action was marginally better than the previous two films but it's saving grace was the cast. No I'm not talking about the same guys who have been phoning it in for the past two movies, I mean the newbies. Antonio Banderas stole the movie, he was brilliant. Snipes delivered like I haven't seen him do so in years and despite all the criticism I think Rousey did a great job as well.So fine, it's not the big action blockbuster to end all action blockbusters but it blows the previous two movies out of the water. With a great villian, the new cast and a good lengthy finale it's passable stuff.The Good:As much as it pains me to say, Mel GibsonAntonio Banderas & Ronda RouseyThe Bad:Robert Davi was wastedStill mindless cliched stuffThings I Learnt From This Movie:Every person on the planet without any formal training can wield any type of firearm like a professionalThe moment Gibson was outed as a bigot, he started doing bad guy roles and nailed it every timeI genuinely want to know if it's possible to attain/maintain a physique like Stallones without steroidsCountless explosive shells fired from tanks at a building rigged with explosives won't set them offDisguising yourself as a bad guy complete with helmet without your allies knowing you're doing it in a full assault situation makes perfect sense

OK, it's not as dramatic as most of the movies the lead players would play, but it's a bit of fun and I quite enjoyed it. The first was, err sort of ok, the second was cringeworthy, but this was fun. Don't expect any suspenseful, dramatical stuff with a plot, this is just a fun action movie you can enjoy and laugh at.

Thank god this is the last Expendables movie. This is easily the worst Expendables movie. I wanna die.

After an action packed start Sly decides to retire his old Expendable crew and recruit some new blood for a deadly mission in Romania. Needless to say it all goes wrong and it's down to the old guys to come and save the day. As per usual our heroes are immune to bullets, have an unlimited supply of weapons and the plot is as predictable as what day it is tomorrow. But that's all part of the fun. We get a star studded cast though sadly Antonio Banderas still thinks that he's playing Puss in Boots. Probably the weakest of the first three movies but still good fun.