Noah's Ark (1999)

Really Surprised!

One of my all time favorites.

Pretty good movie overall. First half was nothing special but it got better as it went along.

The film never slows down or bores, plunging from one harrowing sequence to the next.

Complete waste of four hours of time I'll never regrettably get back. I wish our local library would take it off the shelves. Their "poetic license" goes way beyond the boundaries of that definition. Complete travesty and pile of junk. For starters, Noah's sons AND THEIR WIVES entered the ark. Secondly, mankind remaining and the poor remaining animals were destroyed immediately by this epic point in history. Pirates?? Pirates such as depicted in this film didn't appear until circa 1700s or so.Most of this four hour travesty is spent adding bunk such as Lot gleefully breaking off his wife's salt-pillared finger to show off later in the film; a much too long pirate fight scene, and the mysterious Peddlar for whose presence in the film remains a complete unnecessary sporadic figure. The arguing, shrewish details cast upon Lot's wife, while completely ignoring or barely referencing the Rainbow's first appearance to mankind as a symbol of a covenant between God and Noah. The stupid, manic depictions of the survivors on the boat, which by the way, was SEALED by God until they landed. Ugh. Terrible, terrible movies. Bunk.How the great Jon Voight and Mary Steenburgen managed to get suckered into this adaptation of a beautiful Biblical story pummelled by the idiocy of modern screenwriters is beyond me.

This is a joke right? I watched this once long ago and forgot that I watched it, so I watched it again. Should have changed the channel. The huge oversight in the movie, first and foremost is when the writers wrote the screenplay for this, they totally messed up the Lot/Sodom and Gomorrah story. Noah NEVER met Lot.Sodom and Gomorrah happened long after Noah was gone and the one who saved Lot was Abram later re-named Abraham by the Lord God. The filmmakers should have read the Bible passages that dealt with Noah. The only thing Noah and his family were responsible for is building the Ark and saving their own family. If you want to see a more accurate and entertaining version of Noah's Ark see the segment contained in the movie "The Bible," released in 1966. That starred the great actor John Huston as Noah who gave a lot of depth, some comedic flare as well as believability to the role of Noah. Plus even the voice of God was more believable. Another thing the writers left out was that Lot had two daughters that were also saved. Judging from all the reviews I read the majority of people who viewed this movie, thought it was horrible. All in all this movie was just plain awful. Both in Biblical inaccuracies, acting and the plot. They even had some strange bit in there about Noah and others going mad on the ship which also was inaccurate. So all things considered, I do not recommend this movie.

It's become popular over the years to consider this a bad film, yet many don't seem to realize the producer's intentions. This film was created as a comedy or light drama. There are many aspects deliberately included for the purpose of humour. However, many of the jokes just don't come across properly and when taken seriously make the film seem bad.There are many aspects of it that differ from the actual Bible story, however one must realize that the Bible story is only about a paragraph long. So trying to do the story as written would make it difficult to do even a half-hour story.This film is best enjoyed if you just take it as a creative retelling and don't take it seriously. And it's obvious that it never was meant to be taken seriously. Those elements pointed out as bad writing, such as the pirates, were deliberately added with a tongue-in-cheek approach. If anything is bad about it, it's that the comedy doesn't come across as well as it's suppose to.When buying this film one has to be careful of the version they get. There are many versions in which scenes have been deleted such as the incident with the pirates. Some versions run 140 minutes while others are 160 minutes for multiple parts. 178 minutes is listed as the full running time, but the mini-series when aired was presented in two parts. Some releases have it in three parts, including end credits. The TV version shortened the end credits and ran about 173-174 minutes long (without ads). So it's hard to tell if the 178 minute version is counting the end credits twice. But it would seem that the full version is 178 minutes long. (I don't have the different versions to compare.)

NBC should be ashamed. I wouldn't allow my children to see this. I definitely would tell my church to stay away. This movie is proof as to why NBC has always been a 3rd rate network The producers, actors, and writers should get on their knees and beg God's forgiveness for making this work of fiction. There were no pirates. Noah's wife didn't parade around on the deck of the ark. The ark had NO deck. Lot wasn't even born when this event took place. Did anyone attached to this project try reading the Bible? There were more than two animals of each type taken. Read the story in Genesis. How could anyone bring this to any screen, small or large!